Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Tips for Successful Gay Dating

Gay Dating is quickly becoming the norm in the mainstream dating scene. Gay dating sites are popping up all over the internet, and already established sites are expanding, building whole sections dedicated to same sex love. There are many myths surrounding the whole Gay dating arena - some say it is easy, yet others appreciate that it isn't always as easy as it looks to find a partner. Of course with the vast expansion of the internet and the sheer number of people on it, one of the first places people look to is the increasing number of personals sites on Google.

The newer of us usually start by searching out the free online matchmaking sites - they're available for most target groups nowadays, whether you be a teen, a young adult, single parent, etc. some sort of free service will be available to you - Gay dating included. As with a few things though, it's probably best to jump straight in at the deep end when exploring the gay dating scene. There are paid and membership sites out there that are much more rewarding, and ultimately safer, than many of the free versions you find online. Its always best to err on the side of caution when exploring this topic.

After contact with another gay dater has been made, it is definitely best to get to know them as a friend, before you ever consider dating them. Once the way is paved and you are certain that the person in question is genuine, a good approach is to set up a meeting between them and yourself using the following criteria: Get them to bring their friends, and you bring yours. Don't ever meet them alone, not at least for the first few meetings. Another good tip is to ensure that you meet in a public place such as a restaurant or cinema.

Playing it safe isn't always the most desirable course of action, but as the old addage goes, it's better to be safe than sorry.



Jewish Matchmaking - Does Jewish Matchmaking Really Work?

With thousands of men finding romance (and more!) online, Jewish Matchmaking services seem to be popping up everywhere! But do they really help you find women?

Well first, you may be thinking, "What is the difference between Online Matchmaking and Online Dating?" Good question. And the line is often blurred.

The best distinction I've heard, is that matchmaking has marriage as a definite "end goal". Whereas dating has more flexible goals (starting new relationships, finding sexual partners, or yes, even "playing the field"). But people who use a Dating Service, often wind up "pairing off" anyways - so the distinction really doesn't exist.

Even more confusing for you, is the fact that there are many types of services who claim to be "matchmakers": singles publications, speed dating events, private matchmakers, and now, even some "social networking sites". So let's clear up some of the confusion, by looking at how Matchmaking works (online and offline).

Historically, the Jewish Matchmaker would obtain information about the bride and groom. Then they would "introduce" the prospective pair, then handle the wedding arrangements. Today's Matchmaking service still obtains detailed information from you. Then they try to personally match you up with their other members, based upon that information obtained. The problem is, the so-called personal method is in reality, antiquated, inefficient and oddly enough - impersonal! Today's Online Dating Sites have highly efficient, computer-based methods for obtaining your personal information, that automatically filter out the "bad" matches - then let YOU do the choosing, from their huge memberships.

Which brings us to the next disadvantage of Matchmaking services vs. Dating sites: Size. Matchmaking services (and even online Matchmaking sites), are typically much smaller (since they operate "manually"). Which means that Online Dating Sites provide you with a far LARGER group of "prospects" to choose from.

Then there's the cost. Jewish Matchmaking services typically charge a monthly fee. Translation: You pay... and pay... and pay.

Dating Site charges are typically one-time. Then after that, they charge per-use which is more fair: You only pay for results! Add on to that, the fact that most Dating Sites offer Free services. And those services are typically the kind you use upfront!

The final disadvantage of Matchmaking services - are the scams. Recently, we've seen a flurry of "fly-by-night" Matchmaking services, come and go (with your money!). The large Dating Sites on the other hand, have their track record (and their huge size), to insure that they will continue to operate for the long term.

Ok then. We've looked at the disadvantages of Matchmaking services. So where do you go instead?

You go for the gold: Online Dating Sites.

Why go with an Online Dating Site? Because of the tremendous Dating advantages you get! Now, this article is about Matchmaking services, so I can't cover those advantages here, in detail. (See my next article in this series - more about that below.)

But briefly: You get hundreds (even thousands) of potential partners to choose from. You are "approached" by interested women/men 24 hours a day. You can "get to know" someone using multiple tools for interactive communication, BEFORE you meet them. You can "approach" whoever you desire, without any risk of in-person "rejection". Plus best of all, you can do it all from the comfort of your home - sitting in front of your computer!

In conclusion, Online Dating Services provide free services upfront, allow you to interact online with your prospective mate (without having to use expensive dinners, movies, parties, whatever - just to "meet"), and allow you to get acquainted without the risk of in-person "rejection". Single Jews in particular, can choose from a large number of established, reputable dating sites - that have a large database of Jewish singles. Singles who are looking for you!

So can you really meet quality, fun, sexy, Jewish women online? Yes! Many happy Jewish couples say that they would have never met their partners, if they had not been using an Online Dating Service.

But I'll tell you the truth: Even though you'll have better results from an Online Dating Site, than from Jewish Matchmaking - it's not as easy as "they" say it is. To use all the great advantages of an Online Dating Service, to YOUR advantage - you have to know the "secrets". And that is the subject of my next article in this series, which you can read at: http://jewishdating-service.blogspot.com/

Did you know it takes 2 YEARS for the average guy using a Matchmaking or Dating service, to find the "right" girl? Can you afford to wait that long? Knowing the Secrets to finding your dream girl, can cut that time to a few, quick months! Go to Jewish Matchmaking and find out how YOU can learn to get so many dates - your friends will think you own a modeling agency!



Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Avram_Z

Why We Date

As human beings we have what can be considered some of the strangest mating rituals in the animal kingdom. Most species hook up with members of the opposite sex to procreate and nothing else. There is no emotional bond that ties them together for the rest of their lives other than the need to continue the species. Now that's not to say that all animals are like this, there are some species out there that do mate for life, but the overall percentage of those types are small.

Sure, you can say that many animals have mating rituals that rival ours. There are male birds that flaunt their colorful plumage trying to attract a female, but is that really dating or just a type of seduction? And in the end isn't that what going on dates is all about, seducing that someone we've had our eye on.

Dating is a form of seduction, only for us humans it can sometimes take a much longer time for the desired results to be had. In the animal world there is a specific time of the year when seduction and mating can take place, and with the exception of humans, dolphins and some primates, animals mate to continue their species and not for the pure pleasure of it. For most animals it is the drive to survive as a species.

We humans have taken the whole dating/seduction ritual to unforseen heights. Just think of all the things we do to try and impress that special someone. And why do we want to impress them? Because we think we like them and if we don't do our best to seduce them using all sorts of dating tricks and techniques then someone else will and that's just not acceptable.

So why do we date?

To impress someone we are interested in? I would say yes on that one. I can't think of any other reason to spend that kind of time and money other then to do just that.

To continue the human species? This is a far more subjective question. Do we really need more humans on the world? That's debatable. I think for the majority of humans it's for a little more selfish reasons and that's to have somone come after us who carries the family name onward into the future.

Just for the fun of it? Now here's whole another way to look at it. Meeting new people is fun. Particularly if you are attracted to them. Dating is fun and it introduces us to whole new ways of thinking and approaching people.

The why do we date question is a hard one to answer, but whatever your reasons may be it's a part of what makes us human.

Andrew Bicknell is a writer and owner of Romancing Hearts.com. Please visit his website for more advice about Online Dating, Romance, and Matchmaking.



Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Andrew_Bicknell

Monday, September 24, 2007

Dating Advice: Using The Triple R Technique

So, you’ve gone on a date with a girl and you really like her. Now you want to make sure that she wants to continue dating you. One way to assure a second date is to be very attentive on the first date to one specific topic that SHE brought up. The first step to The Triple R Technique™ is Remembering. Remember as much as possible about a specific topic that she spoke about. Try to pick a topic that she seemed very interested in.

To demonstrate this technique I’ll use a specific situation where I used it recently. I was out a restaurant on a first date with an extremely attractive woman. She was really into cooking. She was telling me about all the different recipes that she loved to prepare. I could tell that she was really passionate about it. So what did I do after the date? I moved on to the second R and did some simple Research. I went to the food network’s website and found some upcoming shows that looked interesting. You can just as easily go to tvguide.com and do a search for anything she might have been talking about. For example, if she was really into tennis, you can search for upcoming shows or tennis or search elsewhere online for upcoming tennis events. The next thing I did was called her a few days after our date and I got her voicemail. So I took this opportunity to perform the third R of the triple R Technique. I Recited the new information that I gathered. I remembered she spoke about how she loved making all different kinds of pasta sauces. In my message I included, “Oh, by the way, Emeril is making his Penne Vodka sauce on his show tomorrow night on the Food Network. I doubt it’s as good as yours but I figured I’d let you know if you wanted to pick up a few tips.” Always have this prepared before your phone call after the first date. This way, if she was semi-interested in you and let’s her phone go to voicemail, you have just increased your chances substantially of her calling you back.

She will love the fact that you actually listened to what she was saying and took an active interest in it. She’ll be amazed because I highly doubt any other guys have ever done this, thereby making you different and interesting.


http://www.articledashboard.com/Article/Dating-Advice--Using-The-Triple-R-Technique/308807

Rejection And How To Deal With It

I really take comfort in knowing that nobody like to be rejected. It hurts and can also be quite a blow to the old self esteem. But getting rejected in connection with dating is absolutely the worst kind of rejection because it touches us on such a personal level. It doesn't matter whether the rejection occurs while asking someone out on an initial date, or in the middle of a long term relationship. Rejection hurts. Period.

In fact, the "after effects" of being rejected, dumped or dissed (take your pick) by the opposite sex can linger around for years. I can still recall that lost, empty feeling I had as a teenager after my first girlfriend pushed the rejection button on our dating relationship of one week. I didn't even get a rejection letter. Sigh.

If you are a single Christian who has suffered rejection in your dating life, and has experienced accompanying depression and loneliness, be encouraged by considering the following:

Know That God Is Working It All For Your Good

You know, I hate it when people quote Bibles verses to me when I am going through a painful moment. Just shut up and be with me if you wish, but don't get preachy until I have time to process.

Anyway, I suppose most of you already know this wonderful promise from Romans 8:28. If we love God, He really will work everything (even rejection) for our good, even if it doesn't feel possible at the time.

By way of example, I can share stories of singles who were heartbroken because their girlfriends or boyfriends broke up with them. However, months later they were thanking God for having been rejected because had that not happened, they never would have met their present soulmates. It's really amazing how your Lord works, so just hang in there, okay?

Understand That Everyone Experiences Rejection.

Rejection is not something just poor little you has to suffer. The rejection bug infects all of us from time to time. That's just the way it is. If you have read the news recently, you'll see that even outwardly beautiful and famous people like Christine Brinkley and Jennifer Aniston suffer rejection. Even our dear Saviour, Jesus, suffered rejection by others (Isaiah 53:3).
If you are a single Christian who has suffered rejection in your dating life, and has experienced accompanying depression and loneliness, be encouraged by considering the following:

Know That God Is Working It All For Your Good

You know, I hate it when people quote Bibles verses to me when I am going through a painful moment. Just shut up and be with me if you wish, but don't get preachy until I have time to process.

Anyway, I suppose most of you already know this wonderful promise from Romans 8:28. If we love God, He really will work everything (even rejection) for our good, even if it doesn't feel possible at the time.

By way of example, I can share stories of singles who were heartbroken because their girlfriends or boyfriends broke up with them. However, months later they were thanking God for having been rejected because had that not happened, they never would have met their present soulmates. It's really amazing how your Lord works, so just hang in there, okay?

Understand That Everyone Experiences Rejection.

Rejection is not something just poor little you has to suffer. The rejection bug infects all of us from time to time. That's just the way it is. If you have read the news recently, you'll see that even outwardly beautiful and famous people like Christine Brinkley and Jennifer Aniston suffer rejection. Even our dear Saviour, Jesus, suffered rejection by others (Isaiah 53:3).

Learn From The Experience

None of us like to experience rejection. But when it does come, we should take the opportunity to take stock of what has just occured. You may never know all the whys, but let the following rejection hotline questions guide your own soul searching process:

* Will I allow rejection to make me a bitter person or will I look for the positives in my experience to build on in the future?

* Do I need to make any changes in my life physically, emotionally or spiritually?

* Can I forgive the person who rejected me?

Know Where Your Self Worth Comes From

It doesn't matter what others think of you. What a trap to base your self-esteem on that! It doesn't even matter what you think of yourself. The real issue is that our true worth comes from what God thinks about you. The true fact is He loved you enough to die for you, and considers you very valuable (Luke 12:7).
None of us like to experience rejection. But when it does come, we should take the opportunity to take stock of what has just occured. You may never know all the whys, but let the following rejection hotline questions guide your own soul searching process:

* Will I allow rejection to make me a bitter person or will I look for the positives in my experience to build on in the future?

* Do I need to make any changes in my life physically, emotionally or spiritually?

* Can I forgive the person who rejected me?

Know Where Your Self Worth Comes From

It doesn't matter what others think of you. What a trap to base your self-esteem on that! It doesn't even matter what you think of yourself. The real issue is that our true worth comes from what God thinks about you. The true fact is He loved you enough to die for you, and considers you very valuable


http://www.articledashboard.com/Article/Rejection--and-How-to-Deal-With-It/308803

Honest Lovers Can Win

Homely women have been cornered in a culture that worships physical beauty. They have tried all paths in their search for an acceptable man and have not had a date in years. They have tried going out on blind dates, many of the guys were perfect for them but they never returned. There is no hope for these homely women ever finding a man and they have no choice but to accept final rejection. There is no fury like a woman that is scorned. Many women take alcohol or drugs to quiet the pain of their loneliness, others have swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills and said goodbye to a cruel world. The brave woman does not tear herself apart but becomes a prime fighter against her loneliness and finds other interests.

Men and women are not as compatible as is generally thought. Most single men find women useful only as a means to satisfy their sexual needs, but if the woman is the mother of his children she is needed for many other things. Women on the other hand need men for financial reasons and little else. It is surprising that so few men and women accept the fact that they are psychologically unfit for each other.


A heterosexual man will not date the most beautiful or intelligent women for more than a few times unless he is sexually rewarded. I have observed this fact to be true after witnessing thousands of breakups after the man was denied sexual satisfaction. Of cause there are exceptions to the rule but that does not alter my assertion. Most single men after being sexually satisfied find something else to do which leaves the woman alone. It is a rare man that hangs around a woman after she gave him what he was after. It is no different after watching a good movie. When it is over it is time to leave. A man who shares his children with a woman is bound by responsibility. His relationship to her is more complex but his psychological incompatibility remains. More than half of married couples break up before ten years of marriage. They wisely go their own ways. The others remain for financial security or other factors that rarely have anything to do with love.

A single woman spends a lot of her time searching for a husband. The type of husband she is looking for hopefully can give her the financial security she needs to live like a queen. There are not that many wealthy guys available so she compromises and accepts a middle income husband. After having a few children and working like a slave to rear them, she comes to the realization that she does not need him at all. With his child support payments and her job she can have a better lifestyle without his annoyance. After a long court battle for their assets she finally is rid of him. Her house is now her castle and she and the children are happier without him dictating to them. Her phone is now alive with divorcees that want to meet her for dinner or dancing. She is free at last and she will never return to the type of life she just gave up.

The homely women are no longer lonely. They have found lots of girlfriends and spend quality time with them. The community center is not far from their homes and is open all the time. The art classes have taught them how to paint in oils and they are there every evening. Board games are available and women love them. After hearing all the heartbreaking stories from the divorced and sometimes battered women at the center the homely women are happy that they never got involved with a man. It comes to their mind that their homeliness might have served as a blessing.

There is nothing evil about a single man that enjoys sex with a woman. Most men do, and it is programmed into their genes. Men seek out women for the sole purpose of having sexual pleasure. But due to the mindset of women men must not disclose this secret to anyone but trusted male friends. It is against a women’s financial interest to date a guy that is only focused on having sex with her. She wants a man that enjoys only expensive things, and places his sexual desires in a secondary position. Men have interests that are not hers and he does not need the company of a woman to share them.

Men and women should be honest with each other and disclose their real purpose in dating. But if they did they would never date. If a guy told a woman all he wanted from her is sexual pleasure she might slap him and walk away. That is why a man has to lie and tell her that he is interested in theatre and traveling---if he does a love session will soon follow. If a woman told the truth and said all she needs from the guy is financial security or a free vacation in Europe he will be insulted. It is obvious that some sort of give and take values have to be accepted if men and women will be able to get along.

There are sex toys available to women and they work perfectly. Woman that try them never give them up. There is no sexual advantage for a woman having a man. The dildo does a much better job. Men that ask women for a date should be ready to spend enough money to give the lady a great time. If they are broke they are absolutely useless to a woman with a sex toy.

I am a man and understand men’s needs. We all enjoy making love to attractive women. Some men are more fortunate and have a better sex life than others but we all get our hugs and kisses. I think it is wrong to lie to a woman about your real needs. Tell her the truth after you have taken her out nicely. If she thinks you are worth keeping you will get what you are after. Guys that are cheap or broke should stay out of the dating game. They are causing harm to women by their lies. Men and women can get along but only if they are honest with each other.
melviiin1@verizon.net


http://www.articledashboard.com/Article/Honest-Lovers-Can-Win/308912

Soul Mates, Twin Flames, & Your Love Life – Why You Can’t Always Get What You Want

We are convinced, based on our research, that everyone has many soul mates, not just one, and no soul mate connections are perfect.

There are many “experts” who say you can meet your “soul mate” simply by purchasing their love spell, following their plan, reading their book, attending their seminar, or praying to the right angels.

Most of these “experts” fail to acknowledge that you can’t just have what you want right now if it’s not meant to be. Instead, they pander to the instant gratification demands of the general public. Too many ignore the importance of getting to know yourself on all levels, discovering what you need to accomplish in this life, and other higher-minded values.

Promoting captivating half-truths and wishful thinking dressed up in sophisticated-sounding phrasing might fatten profits, as many “best-selling” New Age authors have found, but in the end it only serves to mislead and add to the massive New Age misinformation heap.

Sure, we appreciate inspiring and creative writing, especially when it’s grounded in truth instead of cozy escapism. When one simple idea is stretched into pages of wistful, much-about-nothing, long-winded prose, and one concise paragraph could have outlined the point, it just confuses the reader. Really, truth isn’t complicated, and you should be wary if you have to read a passage more than a few times to get its meaning.

We agree that the Universe (or God, or your Angels, or your Guides, or your Higher Self) does respond to questions as we’ve experienced the benefits of this countless times.

But as we’ve said before, we disagree that you can have something just because you want and ask for it, unless it’s part of your destined path, regardless of how much you heal yourself and regardless of how much energy and inspiration you direct toward your desire. There is no Santa Claus. If you could receive anything you wanted in this lifetime, you could just ask for and receive the winning lottery numbers or anything else, even if it didn’t match your destined path.

To avoid disappointment and wasting your time, it’s important to be your own Santa and not expect rewards from anyone or any power outside yourself just because you feel you’re entitled to them. You only get what you want if you've earned it, often times through past life, not current life, behavior and action. Just because you’ve been “good” in the recent past, doesn’t mean you'll be rewarded for that now.

Regarding twin souls or true equals, it’s debatable whether they really exist or if the concept is absolute New Age nonsense. If you’re referring to someone who is your most compatible match (which may or may not be a lasting, rewarding relationship connection, depending upon your personal love karma), then yes, we do feel everyone has soul mates who are more compatible than others. But if you’re hoping for your “other half,” someone who is a “perfect” match with whom you’ll have the ideal relationship, we must inform you that based on our research, we feel that concept is pure fiction and fantasy.

If you view love relationships as a means to fulfill an emptiness inside of you, or something that will give you all that you dream of emotionally, sexually, mentally, spiritually, or financially, you can be confident that your outlook on love is unbalanced and unrealistic. In time, you will be forced to face any feeling of lack you hoped to eliminate through connecting with another person.

Does that sound a little harsh to you? We would rather blatantly present our findings and our professional opinions than lead you down a primrose path of illusion like we see happen too often in today’s New Age marketplace.

Concerning love spells, we advise against them for two reasons. The first is that when you cast a spell, you are accessing and bringing forth energy that may not be for the highest good of all involved or that may even be dangerous if not used correctly. While Wicca spells, for example, can be very beneficial, we feel only those serious students of Wicca who understand what they are doing should dabble in spells. The second is that it’s not anyone’s right to manipulate another person, and sometimes love spells encourage this.

Also, we firmly believe, through years of observation, that karma overrides spells. In other words, someone might be able to “create” a life circumstance through worship or spell-casting, but it won’t last (and could possibly be harmful) if it isn’t harmonious with one’s karmic and fated plan.

We encourage you to learn to enjoy being independent and make the most of yourself on all levels now so you’re ready for the right person at the right time. We are also supportive of the idea that it’s necessary to know yourself and what you want in a relationship if you want to make the most of your love life. A simple question to whomever you pray such as “What’s my next step to improve myself and my love life?” can work wonders. Ask this as often as you need to for insight. With practice, you’ll find that asking before bed will often result in waking up with answers or awareness.

Ultimately, the only way to have an authentically happy love life is to stop looking outside yourself for love. Think about that.



http://www.articledashboard.com/Article/Soul-Mates--Twin-Flames----Your-Love-Life---Why-You-Can-t-Always-Get-What-You-Want/309400