Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Talking To Women In Bars

Mark was talking to a woman in a crowded, noisy bar so he made sure he spoke loudly so she could hear him. Everything seemed to be going well for the first minute or so and then she appeared to lose interest, grabbed her girlfriend and said "sorry, we gotta go". A few minutes later Mark saw the same woman talking to other men. What did I do wrong? Mark thought to himself.

Millions of singles go to bars to drink, meet people, and to hook up. For some men, this is the only way they know how to meet women. Bars come in all shapes and sizes. You've got your hole-in-the-wall establishment all the way to the large, extravagent bar with a live band or DJ. The hottest, trendiest bars are always packed on the weekends and are swamped with gorgeous women. The bar owners know if they can get hot, young women to go to their establishment, the men will follow. The men will buy them drinks, they'll spend money on appetizers (if they have a kitchen), and so on.

Talking to women in bars presents some advantages because you can talk to dozens of women in the course of one night because they are all there in one spot. It can also be a disadvantage if everyone sees you hit on every thing that walks. That actually makes you look bad. So what's a man suppossed to do? First off, you've got to have the right knowledge. With knowledge comes power. You've got to realize that bars are place for women to burn off some steam, maybe meet some hot guys, and to have a good time. Whereas men go to bars usually to pick up and "get lucky". This is the main difference between men and women in a bar setting. A woman can go out with her girlfriends, dance together, and go home thinking "wow I had a great time." If a man leaves a bar without a phone number or a hookup he feels like a failure.

It does not have to be this way. The first thing you have to realize is that you are not going to master the bar scene in one weekend. So you have got to commit to going out every weekend and even during the week to get this handled. There is no way around this. Unless you are consistently opening women and groups of women every single weekend until you no longer have issues with the bar scene, you are not going to get very far. So once you make a commitment, now you have got to see the bar scene for what it really is. Women go there to get validation, to get attention from men, and have a good time. Men go there to hook up. It is really that simple.

When you are talking to a woman in a bar realize that she is not being herself. She is wondering why you picked her to talk to. You cannot give her time to think. This is why it is generally better to talk to someone as soon as you see them. Of course, as you get better at this you will know when to open and when not to. A woman is not going to let her guard down right away. If she is an attractive woman then she has been getting hit on all night, the prior weekend, and thousands of times over the years. So nothing you come up with will be new and original. She's heard it all. Or has she?

Every once in a blue moon the hottie will be approached by a man who never offers to buy her a drink. He talks to her in a loud, booming voice, but not in annoying way. She can tell right away that this man is not looking to get anything from her other than conversation. She can also tell that he is very confident because he is standing up straight, looks her in the eye, and seems to be calm no matter what is going on. She wants his attention but does not want to seem eager. After all, she does not want to seem easy.

How do you become such a man? A man who can attract a woman in a bar setting. What does it take? Like I said before it takes knowledge. Remember that a bar is not reality. The majority of women that go to bars are generally attention seekers, that's why they go. Sure, some of them want to hook up and over time you will be able to pick them out. Here's what you can do to make this whole process easier on yourself.

Go to another city that you rarely go to and find a hot bar or club to hang out at. All you have to do is ask around or do research on the internet. Websites such as Yelp can help you make an informed decision. For the first weekend go out by yourself or with a friend who understands what you are trying to do. When you enter the bar pay close attention who the bouncers are, the staff, and make sure you ask the bartender his or her name. Tip generously because that will make you stand out from the dozens of other patrons. I make it a point to get to know at least a couple of the bartenders at places I frequent. They know me by name, they know what I like, and because I tip well they make my drinks strong. So I only need 2 or 3 drinks tops for the whole night. You don't want to get drunk if you are going to approach women, it messes up your game big time.

Walk around and observe. What are the coolest guys wearing? Then go to the bar, order your drink, and chat up the bartender. Make sure you show up early before the crowd gets there, otherwise the bartenders will be too busy to really chat it up. That's all you're going to do your first weekend is to observe. This takes the pressure of you. Now here comes the toughest part. The following weekend you are going to go back to the same place. Do not think. As soon as you walk in the door approach the first woman or group that you see. Do not think. Just do it. It helps to rehearse some material before you go out too. But you do not want to rely on it.

Do not focus on the mistakes you are going to make because you are going to make a ton of them. That's part of the learning. Focus on having a good time, meeting new people, and having natural conversation. Make sure you talk in a loud voice, at least loud enough for them to hear you. Stay away from asking them what they do for work or what school they go to. Women think in terms of feelings and emotions, this is why it is important to have good eye contact with all of them, talk loudly, and staying relaxed. These women do not know you yet so they cannot reject you. Talking to women in bars can be a whole lot of fun as long as you do not take it too seriously. If you do not have fun with this you are not going to be in the right state of mind to learn this. One of my friends pretends its a video game when he goes out. He gets one point for opening a woman, he gets 5 points if he can hold their interest for longer than 5 minutes and he gets 10 points for getting a phone number. His goal when he goes out is to get a minimum of 50 points. Sometimes he gets more than 100.

Talking to women in bars actually gets easier over time. If you do not practice you will never get good at this. This is like any skill. The first time you rode a bike or drove a car were you great at it? Of course not. It is the same thing with learning how to talk to women in bars.

Rod Cortez is an international dating coach who can show you proven methods for meeting, talking to, and dating attractive women. His free newsletter will quickly teach you how: http://www.thedatepro.com/



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What To Avoid When Flirting and Dating Women

There are certain things that instantly kill attraction between a man and a woman. You're fascination with chess openings, or your knowledge of different kinds of Swiss army knives for example.

Most guys have some weird thing they do which women hate. So the question becomes... how do I handle this in a way that doesn't make her lose attraction toward me?

You can try to hide it. I don't think this is the best strategy. I have no scientific research, but my intuition has led me to believe this communicates with women: “I am not completely comfortable with who I am.” Big turn off.

How do you handle it? First, let's agree on one thing. Attraction has it's own rules. These rules don't coexist with logic. They are largely based on emotion. It is absolutely essential you understand and accept this before we go forward. Got it?

Onward.

The first rule of attraction – you can't bore a woman into liking you. While she may ask you about where you work and what your hobbies are... if you answer them straightforward... you will bore her.

It doesn't matter that she brought up the topic. She will blame you. And more importantly she will lose interest.

The second rule of attraction – it is better to be evasive than to be boring. Remember what we agreed upon? Attraction isn't logical. Here's how it works. Teasing a woman, ribbing on her, and giving her a bit of hard time... instead of directly answering her stale questions... is preferred by her.

It's not that you're “hiding” anything from her when she asks you were you work and you say, “Funny you should ask, I defend midgets in criminal lawsuits.” No. What you are doing is showing her you enjoy yourself and you are in control of the conversation not her.

Rule number 3 – women are more attracted to men who are in control of the conversation. It doesn't make sense and it's not supposed to.

Take me for instance, I'm a bit of a weirdo. I actually am fascinated with chess openings (and collect chess clocks). I love tropical saltwater fish and like 80's hair bands. So? It doesn't matter to me one iota if a woman knows this.

It makes no difference.

If you do the right things with a woman... things like keeping the conversation interesting, being evasive but playful, and show you are in control and will not be a wuss and give up your power as a man (like most men do when they trying to get a woman to like them) then guess what?

You won't have to worry about hiding anything from a woman.

Kurt Dight has created a free 5 day mini course on "how to seduce almost any woman". It is available for instant access for a limited time at http://www.dating-secrets2.com/


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Online Dating Etiquette

So you finally signed up to the ever-growing Internet dating scene, but are not sure how you should behave and what is right and wrong to say over the web, or even if there is a correct way for you to speak. Well I'm afraid there is a correct way to speak over the Internet and it is known as Online Dating Etiquette.

Firstly what is etiquette, before we learn how to use it in the dating context, simply put etiquette is a pre-defined collection of policies, rules or customs that suggest or advise the minimum acceptable level or best form of behaviour in particular social groups, situations or events. Online Dating Etiquette is about an acceptable level of behaviour when communicating to members of those on dating websites. It is mainly about good manners and little else.

The secret to Online Dating Etiquette is that there is not much manners needed, just simply politeness so you do not get blocked, but if you are looking to date these women/men use any chat up line or seduction method you know. Here are some simple tips to follow:

* Have fun with it, if you are too polite and frightened to say anything amusing you may come across as boring, the best thing to do is be yourself.
* If there is some-one who you have taken a strong interest to, tease him or her, it is a good seduction technique and is fun as well.
* If you don’t like some one who you have been talking to, then just block them or report them if they are being overly aggressive.
* Get to know a person first before you meet them.
* Speak to them over the phone several times and make sure you trust them completely before you arrange a meeting in person.
* Be funny, everyone loves some one with a sense of humour.

For more FREE TIPS on how to approach, talk to, attract and seduce any woman of your choice visit pickupin3days.com


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Creative Dating Ideas For Your Male Date

Ladies, creative dating ideas need not be as difficult as you may think for you to come up with. Guys are simple creatures by nature. Do not think for one minute that I mean that they are stupid or are a lower life form. I mean, they are not as emotional as women are and this makes for a much simpler time of coming up with straightforward ideas for dates.

Remember that the way you treat them is the way they are more inclined to treat you. Do not wait for them to come up with creative ideas, just show them that you care about them and can be fun. Be sure not to hurt the ego by being too forceful with this as some guys can take offense to a girl being totally in control all the time. Make sure that you keep him in mind at all times during the planning process. This is not about what you like and is about showing him that he is so special to you and that you are willing to put some of your wants aside for him. Respecting him will be the biggest way for you to keep him interested and feeling like the top man in your life. He will only have eyes for you.

There are a ton of creative dating ideas that do not take a lot of effort or money to achieve. To plan a special date for your man, you must first look at his personality. Not all guys like football or basketball. He may like to read or listen to music. If he does, a sporting event will not be the way to go with the date. You might find that a good dating idea for the two of you is to spend an evening in a coffee shop listening to a poetry session instead of watching a sweaty basketball game. Gauge the guy and try to fit your date around his personality.

Say your guy likes the sports scene, but you do not have the amount of money it takes to buy those major tickets. The perfect idea is to find out what little league sports are going on in your area. It may not be a professional game, but he will love you for your consideration towards him. A community game is just as good as a professional game, and in fact can allow for a more personal experience. Before you know it, you will be cheering them on as loud as their family members will.

Another idea for being creative is to consider giving him a day with his pals without you and then meeting him later that day. This lets him know that you are not a clingy person, respect his individualism, and expect the same from him. Get in touch with a few of his friends and set up something for them to enjoy that you know he will like. Tell the guys where he will be and after they have had their outing, they can bring him to a designated spot for a nice dinner. This will be very special for him and he will not forget it.

Ladies, remember, guys want to be treated specially, just like you. They want to be treated with respect and made to feel as special as you do. They may be unique in other ways, but when you take their feelings into consideration and plan for them only, they will love it.

Everyone appreciates their partner taking the time to devise creative dating ideas. This proves to them that you were thinking of them only and really considered their feelings. This is a great way to have a good date, win his heart over and have a long relationship. The more fun you can have and personalized the dates, the better your overall relationship will become.

Lee Blackspur is the owner of My-Dating-Advice.com which provides online and offline dating tips, advice and articles for men, women and teens of all ages and experience.


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Why Share Relationship?

It must come to one’s mind often that why do people marry or live together in a men women relationship. Why do people spend so much time matchmaking in their life to find romance or a sex dating partner.

Well the answer is:

Biological: Human being as such is a sexual object. This may seem hard to digest but ask any biologist and he will tell you that primary aim of all living beings is to procreate and maintain their population dynamics on earth. Since humans are single sexed animals it is necessary for male and female of the species to come together and copulate to in order to facilitate reproduction.

Thus chemistry within us works as such that we have a strong desire to mate and hence when humans reach sexual maturity they get pre occupied with the opposite sex and try to meet and interact. The first option is meeting at the place of work, school, and college and of course online dating sites.

In traditional Communities especially in the Orient it is a norm for parents to help their siblings find a mate but this usually is for marriage and young adult rarely get together before marriage and live a segregated life till the nuptials.

But as in present time whatever the West does East follows. Hence dating is catching up in these traditional communities fast and teens are dating more and more now for future matchmaking or romance. Whereas adults go for sex dating to make up for a lack of permanent partner or for their preference for casual adult dating.

Online dating and speed dating are among the most popular ways singles date today. Online or cyber dating is done by placing online ads in web sites that provide dating services, messaging-e-mails, chatting and live web cams.

Emotional Need: Here it is more a feeling insecurity among humans who live their lives as singles or who are forced to live their lives as singles for some reason or others. The desire to share responsibility and that get rid of terrible feeling of loneliness is another reason why male and female come to live together. All this makes sense as any body would tell you. Thus marriage is a major event in our lives. Though humans have now started to live together in a non conditional or a relationship devoid of any conjugal ties.

I am a freelance writer and journalist published many online adult dating articles related to gay personals relationship, tips for adult dating personals and, online dating and matchmaking online adult dating sites


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Christian Singles Dating Services

Just imagine how beautiful and fulfilling life would be if we had someone whom we loved to share it with. We all dream of finding the person made just for us. It’s believed that our partners are chosen for us from heaven. But still, we need to discover the “chosen one” by putting in a little bit of effort.

Dating services do help us in finding out that special someone who shares our values, beliefs, customs, opinions, and our faith. And to facilitate this, numerous organizations exist, devoted to this purpose.

Online dating services allow members to post their personal profile; browse and view profiles and pictures of other members; view videos; send emails; chat; and enjoy more services. Some networks like Eyva.com even have services like meeting and socializing in person by offering several events.

Networks such as Real Christian Singles, American Singles, My Christian Matchmaker, and Dating Club.com are free and hence, singles can become members and use all the facilities without having to pay anything at all. But others do have paid services only. But even then, most highly successful and top sites offer free trials for a minimum of at least seven days. Christian Soulmates.com, Equally Yoked, Christian Café, Agape Christian Singles, eHarmony, Singlec.com, and Big Church.com are some websites which provide good services and bring together Christian singles.

A good place to form friendships is the church too. Christian singles can gather for Bible study, masses, and other holy purposes.

Organizations such as clubs and travel agencies exist to give ample opportunities for Christians single to meet and form long-lasting friendships. Sandy Cove, a Christian center, organizes regular getaways for couples and singles, providing concerts, conferences, trips, parties etc.

Confidential Christian Introductions, Solid Rock Singles, Square Dancing, Victory Singles, Christian Café, and Catholic Alumni Clubs International are some examples of organizations and clubs that help people to come together to get to know each other. They offer dances, concerts, getaways, dinners, cruises, seminars, cultural events etc.

Christian Singles provides detailed information about christian singles, christian singles dating, christian singles dating services and more. Christian Singles is the sister site of International Matchmaking.

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Dating Tips - Dating Secrets About Women Men Don't Know

Thousands of dating tips and articles are cluttered across the web. Almost all those dating tips and articles suggest several different ways and methods to get a date and do's and don'ts of dating. But dating is not only about do's or don'ts it's rather much more than that. There are several dating secrets about women men do not know and have always been oblivious to. Read on to find out some of the biggest dating secrets men don't know about women.

Nice men are good daters- This is one of the biggest dating misconception. Nice men are always known to finish last no matter how hard they try. This is belief many men carry with themselves thinking they might score a date being nice. This is one of the worst dating belief promoted and passed on through ages. Women prefer men who are good at the dating game and know how to play it.

Ugly men never get dates- Another dating secret most men are oblivious to. You do not have to look like tom cruise to get a date. It's much more than just mere looks and physical aspect. Dating has to do more with the person's overall personality than mere looks. Therefore ugly guys do get dates and not so good looking people have been known to score with exceptionally gorgeous women as well in the dating game.

Dating labor- Most men think it takes a lot of effort and time to get a date. This is another dating secret which is not known to men. You need to be a smart dater instead of being a hard working dater. The only way you can succeed in the dating game is by the proper usage of your brain not brawn.

Women are hard to find- This is another dating myth which is carried by most men who can't find a date. Well if you look around properly you would be amazed to discover that there are more single women looking to date than you can possibly imagine. But women are selective in the dating game. They only choose the best of the lot for dating no matter what. So if you think there is a deficiency of women on this planet than you certainly belong to the weaker lot which women do not prefer in the dating game.

What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman’s mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say. They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Read on to discover some of the most "Shocking Secrets" women don't want men to know- 9 Most Shocking Secrets Women don't want men to know


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Christian Dating Sites

Internet dating or matchmaking services give members the opportunity to look at all the options and make a more informed decision about whom they want to contact. Members of these services are given the opportunity to take the initiative and pursue the person he or she is interested in meeting.

Most internet dating or matchmaking web sites were created for people of any lifestyle, however, many Christian singles realized that meeting other eligible Christians could be quite difficult. Christian Dating Sites emerged from the need of Christian singles to contact other Christian singles in their community. Like other dating web sites, Christian dating sites vary, depending on what the person is looking for.

Some sites target a specific age demographic, such as single Christians over 30 years old. Most sites, however, are for any age and denomination. They vary in the way that the questionnaire is set up and how people can contact each other. Matchmaking and dating services tend to work through questionnaires, and they will ask both in-depth and general questions.

Some Christian dating sites are actual matchmaking services that match one person’s profile with that of another. After the person has filled out the questionnaire or series of surveys, the site will match up the person with a variety of potential dates based on similar interests, demographics, and psychographics. This person can then peruse the list of potential dates and decide whom to contact. Most matchmaking sites like these will also give members the opportunity to perform their own searches based on certain criteria. The site will then direct them to the profiles of the other dating service members that fulfill those criteria.

Other Christian dating sites do not match profiles; rather, they encourage people to register, post a profile, and browse other members’ profiles. The questions asked on these profile-building pages are far more general than the questionnaires on the matchmaking sites. Anyone who is a member is able to contact other members directly; either through a web based email available through that service or through other web-based tools, like blogs.

Christian Dating Info provides detailed information on Christian dating services, sites, and advice. Christian Dating Info is the sister site of Jewish Dating Web.


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