Saturday, June 30, 2007

Five Crucial Points Of Attraction

I was thinking about some of the most IMPORTANT points that make a SERIOUS difference in getting results with women.

Points that most guys don't realize or that they tend to gloss over without understanding their full meaning and impact.

Here they are:

1. For most guys who are new to learning these skills, one of the challenges is that the states of mind they need to be in for the interaction are THE EXACT OPPOSITE of the states they actually feel in that moment.

So, to be precise, the state of being in a GREAT MOOD, and being PLAYFUL, and being COCKY in a GOOD NATURED SENSE, and being SEXUAL, well it all seems not only very DIFFICULT to be in that state when they are starting an interaction with a woman, but also, there is this wrong assumption that you have to ALWAYS be in this state, and so the guy feels he's not being HIMSELF.

And that can lead a guy to feel resentment, because he feels as if these girls are all LIGHT-HEADED and as if the ONLY thing they can think about is FUN, because when he goes in "serious" it never works very well at all.

This leads to more negativity, and more thinking of women as being "different" and crazy, bad, etc. Which makes him even MORE serious and makes him more bitter, etc. And so when he finally does make some effort at "playful", it's TOTALLY FORCED, totally not congruent, and his own bitterness and anger seeps through.

Which turns her off, and gives the guy more negative feedback, hurting his inner game even more.

So, for any guys out there that are in that situation right now, let me immediately say that IT'S NOT THAT WOMEN ARE ALWAYS LIKE THIS, it's that HUMAN SOCIALIZING AND HUMAN SEXUALITY is most COMPATIBLE with this type of state of mind.

Look, the reality is that I am many DIFFERENT things. I can be deadly serious. I like serious stuff. One of my favourite movies of all time is The Sixth Sense. I'm not only all about the laughs, to say the least. There are a lot of other emotions that appeal to me besides playfulness and sexuality.

And sometimes, in some environments, going in for pure intrigue for the pickup can work fantastic. I use this sometimes as well.

However, what's CRUCIAL to understand is that you can't get turned on if you are feeling FEAR. So if you are chatting to a woman, getting her laughing is a great way to overcome the fact you are a stranger.

Also, even in general, the better a person is feeling, the more joy they will get out of EVERYTHING, including sex.

So for that reason as well, you want to put a woman into a BETTER STATE than the state she was in before she met you.

It leads to her more easily transitioning into a sexual vibe with you even from the GET GO of your conversation, interaction, etc.

So you see, you are not FAKING your personality by being playful, fun, sexual, etc, you are doing the only thing that makes SENSE for ANYONE.

To NOT be in the playful state is simply to be acting very strange indeed. Also, the truth is, you probably ARE a playful guy in OTHER situations, so it IS a dimension of your personality, it's just not coming across from you in your interactions with women right now, and you want to change that asap in order to get results.

Remember, this is PICK UP and ATTRACTION, so your interaction must be geared for THAT.

If this was about asking girls to teach you Einstein's Theory of Relativity, then you could go in all serious if you wanted. But this is about sexual stuff, attraction stuff, human emotion stuff.

VIBES are everything.

Next:

2. The point of learning TACTICS and lines is to HELP YOU GET ON YOUR FEET so you can pass the sticking points in your game. This way, once you pass the sticking points, once you get the result several times, you will start to see how all the infinite subtle details gel together as part of the big picture, and you will then no longer need specific "lines" or "tactics".

You will then be able to FAR EASIER get the SAME result instinctively. But the tactics helped you in the beginning.

There is nothing WRONG with tactics per se. My book and CD and even my live programs include many useful tactics as well as all the BIGGER PICTURE insights as well.

Regarding the "tactics" you will see from the way they are presented in the larger context of the program that they are meant only as a tool to get you to a realization of the bigger picture so that you will NOT need the "tactics" anymore.

It's a bit like working out with weights and "cheating" or getting a spotter to help you squeeze out a rep. You get some outside HELP to finish the rep of that exercise. But because you managed to finish the rep, your body gets the benefit of the exercise, and you grow to the point you don't need the spot or the cheat.

Of course, most people TOTALLY abuse the "cheating" or "spotting" principle, and similarly, most guys TOTALLY abuse the "tactics" for improving your skills with dating and attracting the kind of women you want.

When I first started out, I remember I thought there was only one way to kiss a girl that was reliable. The reality is that there are MILLIONS, but having a basic game plan in the beginning allowed me to GET to the whole kissing thing and beyond enough times that I realized that the truth is, a girl will kiss you as soon as she's attracted, period.

But in the beginning, your ego is fragile, so you make a big deal about creating a method to avoid any chance of rejection. But the funny thing is, after a while you get so good at this stuff that you realize that MAKING A BIG DEAL ABOUT THE KISS is in ITSELF A PROBLEM and is not attractive. It's needy, it's being too attached to the outcome of it all.

So you learn to totally stop thinking about that kind of thing and you basically are constantly escalating, and if you happen to escalate too fast a bit, you just chill out and let her catch up to that stage, and you go for it later.

But that doesn't mean learning "tactics" are useless, because as I said, they are a way to help prevent rejection which is something that a beginner cares more about since he doesn't have enough successes yet behind him to not care about it.

Similarly, from having so many interactions, I now have a cache of "lines" that I could use at any time that are virtually GUARANTEED to elicit certain emotional responses from attraction to bonding, etc. Because I am familiar with the delivery of them and the state of mind I said them in and because I know when to say it.

But the reality is that I don't NEED them, and in fact, I don't think about using them much except when I might be so exhausted and am running a pick up when I really should be sleeping. Or for example, if I want to play around with the internet and get girls to respond to ads and don't want to bother with much effort, I will just send out certain responses or messages to a bunch of girls and get a pretty good batting average off of that.

Again, though, it's more FUN to actually BE in the game, and not just be running it robotically, and of course your game runs even better when you are in the zone, for sure, because you can calibrate better to the exact specifications of the situation and of the girl's state.

3. This leads me to another REALLY important point:

THIS STUFF TAKES PRACTICE

A lot of guys who are not prepared to SERIOUSLY put some EFFORT into this, they want to get results from PURELY BEING A ROBOT.

They think there is some perfect, "How to get all chicks in a single bound of memorized tactic and lines".

That is simply RIDICULOUS. It's trying to oversimplify a very dynamic process.

What I DO believe in is TEACHING these skills using various approaches to learning, INCLUDING the use of models and paradigms to view attraction and the pick up process.

So yes, I do definitely use these models as PART of my instruction, but they are just one small tool. The models help give a guy a view of attraction and the pick up process, but no model can perfectly capture the INFINITE VARIETY of variables that can play out in an interaction between you and a woman.

However, the model CAN give you a beginner a useful VIEW of attraction, but being able to see many of the elements of attraction and the pick up process all at once as part of one model.

But that's all it is, a model.

FOR FULL INSIGHT AND EXCELLENCE, you have to understand and apply ALL THE PRINCIPLES.

To an extent, the answer to the "HOW" of pickup is in the "WHY". For example, let's say a guy wants to know how to kiss a girl.

Well, if he understands that, among many other things, that DOMINANCE is key, and he knows that her ANTI SLUT DEFENSE forbids her from taking responsibility for full escalation, and he knows that sexuality is unleashed when she is not thinking but rather FEELING, feeling GOOD, then he will understand that teasing her and getting her laughing and then escalating from holding hands to caressing her cheek to kissing is ONE good way of accomplishing that.

Obviously, understanding the FULL picture on dominance, the anti-slut defense shield, female culture and sexuality, sense of humor, etc, are KEY. THIS is the way to go for success in ALL situations with women, rather than trying to come up with a word-for-word SCRIPT for every situation. That would be ABSURD and not even EFFECTIVE as it would not allow for all the UNIQUE THINGS about that specific situation that you could work in SPONTANEOUSLY once you UNDERSTAND THIS STUFF.

So understanding the "WHY" is very important indeed in order to understand the HOW.

Of course, you want to make sure that you are getting the WHY explained by a guy who actually DOES THIS FOR REAL, WEEK AFTER WEEK, WITH REAL CLIENTS, IN THE REAL WORLD.

Otherwise, you may be getting a messed up picture that will ruin your results in the real world.

4. The fourth point I want to make clear here is the MASSIVE IMPORTANCE of having a life that you are passionate about BESIDES your dating life.

As passionate as you must be for success with women, you need to be JUST AS PASSIONATE about your OTHER goals in life.

Far too many guys get so swept up with the whole women thing, that they soon end up basing their SELF-ESTEEM on it, which opens them up to becoming vulnerable to depression, neediness, obsession, and other nasties, including kissing all the other good things in your life good bye. Such is the need for self-esteem, that if you base it on women, women will rule your life, and that can includes messed up women as well.

So, no matter what, you must MAINTAIN your sense of direction in life, and not let ANY woman, or women in general, affect that. Your direction, your path, your other passions, are what keep you grounded, and keep you strong.

This doesn't mean to not spend time on women, it just means not to lose your IDENTITY along the way.

And if you quit everything else about your life besides the women thing, then that other part of you ceases to exist.

The ironic thing about all this is that having an unshakeable sense of direction is actually VERY ATTRACTIVE to women. So in the end, this only helps your results with women as well.

Which leads me to the fifth point:

5. NEVER, EVER FORGET THE SEXUAL DIMENSION OF YOUR INTERACTION WITH WOMEN.

Remember, this is about leading to SEX. Other things too, perhaps, like a great relationship, but even that is still a SEXUAL thing, otherwise it would just be a friendship, right?

So what this means is that you have to MANHANDLE the interaction. Not in a caveman way, but in a dominant, yet upbeat and smooth way.

Women feel weird about leading the show towards sex. That's how they have been cultured, so it's up to YOU. Besides, do you really want women to take on that role? It's your privilege as a man. It's also your DUTY.

So if you act too anti-septic, too "nice" in that stereotypical way, to non-sexual, if you wait for HER to escalate, if you are afraid to ESCALATE even when the interaction is going well, because you care too much about her possible reaction and her rejecting the escalation, you will get NOWHERE.

It WON'T ESCALATE on it's OWN.

YOU have to make it happen, and you have to make it smooth as well. If you act like you are trying to accomplish something HARD, you are going to be giving off the wrong vibes.

So the idea is to act as if all this is NOT a big deal. If you make it seem like a big deal, it will make HER feel nervous and uncomfortable with you.

Finally, I'd like to say that ultimately, it's really all up to you. You have to WANT this to get good at it. Personally, I think that women, sex, and especially meeting the RIGHT woman and being with her, is an emotional experience that is INSANELY POWERFUL and enriching and well worth the effort.

If this is a goal you'd like to achieve, and you are prepared to WORK on it, instead of looking for a "magic line" then it's time you got yourself the finest education you can possibly get on this topic by ordering my Seduction Mastery Apprenticeship Program.

This Program includes over 11 hours of perfectly organized advanced material that is the result of my last 3 YEARS of total dedication to it. It includes 10 CDs as well as a special book to help ensure you retain and understand what you learn.

This Program is not about short-cuts. There are no short-cuts in life, but you CAN be EFFICIENT with your time by learning from the BEST RESOURCES.

If you are SERIOUS about being the BEST you can be, order this program now at:

http://thedatingwizard.com/seductionmastery.htm

And if you would like to learn in PERSON, I recommend signing up for a super INTENSE environment: BOOTCAMP.

In my Real World Bootcamp, I take you under my exclusive wing and immerse you in all the intricacies of pick up for THREE DAYS and THREE NIGHTS. During all this time, my entire focus will be on you and ensuring you master these skills before graduating.

The Bootcamp is customized for your specific needs and goals, and the dynamic, interactive format accelerates your learning curve to take you to the next level in the shortest possiblee.

It's at:

http://thedatingwizard.com/bootcamp.htm

And if you haven't yet downloaded my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women, then do that now. This book is the foundation for all my other programs.

http://www.singlescafe.net/crucial-points-of-attraction.html?authorname=The%20Dating%20Wizard

Reports From The Real World Of Dating

When it comes to attracting a woman, and especially picking up women from COLD approaches from SCRATCH, there is a cold hard reality: IT TAKES SKILL.

There are bunch of things going on, and at times, many things going on at ONCE: Humor, dominance, leadership, bonding, trust, dealing with her friends or with the logistics of the environment, dealing with your own internal blocks, sexual escalation, changing her state, being able to decode what a woman REALLY means by her words to you when she is speaking to you in the presence of her friends, and finding the right accessories for you as well as sexualizing your wardrobe tastefully, and much MUCH more.

Unless you are a big name movie star or in luck of having model-level looks, it takes SKILL in all these areas and of course a healthy degree of guts as well to GET the girl.

This is the coolest thing, how SKILL can over-ride things like looks and wealth etc.

If you ever watch those tv dating shows, and you see a guy who is not particularly great looking, and he is getting a hottie all into him, observe closely. See, usually the guy TANKS, but it's because the guy has LAME-ASS skills and a weak vibe that is NOT attractive. Not his fault, of course, as society doesn't exactly breed guys properly for success with women, but the fact remains, he fails because of a lack of SKILLS.

You gotta realize that this stuff is very circular as well. See, the guy who is super good looking is not just good looking, he often ALSO benefits from a LIFETIME of being validated and a lifetime of experience with women. The "halo" effect where people think that good looking people are better, smarter, etc etc.

That often helps him develop the other aspects of his personality that actually lead to more experiences with women and all this stuff adds up to a VIBE that counts FAR MORE than looks alone! This is why if a guy is "good looking" but for some reason did NOT get the lifetime of validation, all his looks will still not help him with girls much. The other stuff counts MORE than looks.

And the guy who HASN'T had this validation stuff and tons of experience has a double hill to climb. But he CAN develop these skills and he can SURPASS the guys who were born lucky. But it's gonna take WORK and it's gonna take LEARNING.

But I SWEAR to you, it CAN be done. I've seen it happen in clients. It's a very proud moment for me to watch these guys.

And it doesn't have to take FOREVER.

Here's a letter from a guy who recently downloaded and read my eBook and put it into ACTION. It's not any of that "miracle" hogwash, it's just some SERIOUS progress.

***LETTER FROM A READER***
His First Breakthrough

"Hey Mike,

I am way behind in my studies right now, but I had such a great time last night at a party, I feel as though I have to write you my feedback right now to get it off my chest. I wanted to wait until I closed a deal to write you, but, I had such a great time, I couldn't wait. I purchased your eBook about 5 weeks ago, but I am hoping you'll share my breakthrough with everyone in your newsletters.

Though it took six weeks, it's finally coming together. After gaining the insight, I did have an epiphany as you explained would happen. I spent most of that time rearranging my mentality, observing people, questioning them, building up courage, focusing on my goals, and beginning openers. I also realized how miserable my low self-esteem was making my life-especially when it came to women.

The more I realized how miserable I was though, the more focused I was on breaking out of the terrible slump. I was such a nice guy. My openers were horrible at first. It's very difficult to articulate, but, though my openers didn't necessarily get better, they became more natural (and are becoming).

Anyways, so I'm at the party. I am talking with my friends, and I see two girls at the laptop choosing music, but they were there for quiet awhile. They walked away and this horrible song came on, so I put another song on. I didn't know it at the time, but they had spent about 20 minutes filtering through 500 songs to create their own playlist and I had just deleted it. This girl who is gorgeous walks up to me and says, "hey, you deleted our playlist." LOL, All I was thinking to myself was, "I better effing say something, and it better not be a damn apology or some gaping smile."

So I looked at her and said, "yah, I didn't like it, and don't change my song" and walked away. Even though it wasn't my dream opener, it was so natural-it's as if I didn't even really try to say anything. LOL, you should have seen the expression on her face, like "wow, this guy actually has a nut or two to stand up for himself."

And she didn't change the song. As the night went on, she would get close to me, and I'd tease her, and she'd tease me. It was really a fun time. I had so much fun, not with the teasing so much as her rebuttals-I enjoyed the challenges she gave me, it was so attractive-I wanted her more every time she came back with something. Though my game was weak, there was some kind of connection, and we kept it up most of the time.

Also, lol, I was teasing other girls as much as I could. It became so easy. I fell into this zone where I didn't care what my friends thought (mostly because they are so apologetic). I had difficulty keeping focus because I was having so much fun with her and also the party in general. It was her trying to make eye contact with me--looking to see if I was looking.

For the first time in LONG TIME I was truly enjoying every minute that passed. Everybody was celebrating, and no one was hurting each other (I know, I know-I should be enjoying every minute anyhow, and I work on that, but you know what I mean). Like I said, I didn't seal the deal, but I didn't try to seal it for a reason; I wanted to wake up early to study and get my chores done. What a great night.

When I see a girl now, I don't think, "Man, I hope this girl gives me the time of day," but rather, I say to myself "I gottah give this gurl a tease, I want her challenge, I want to see if she's worth the time of day (I am only awake for about 16 of them). And yes, it has only been one day. Thanks for the newsletters. It's great to have those reminders.

I read the ebook mostly in one night. The next night, I finished it. And I had the epiphany, and I couldn't sleep for two days. The epiphany had more to do with how I see humans in general and my life more than it had to do with women. It was truly a good piece, and it made me think and challenge my thoughts. It was a very worthwhile investment.

I am graduating in May (that's the plan anyways), and I have to drop a lot of money on graduation. I will most likely purchase your CD's in the future. I also have a lot more to work when it comes to women. (Regarding the eBook) I thought it had a very nice flow. It's obvious that you carefully crafted your chapters. Great examples.

Craig T.

***MY RESPONSE*** Okay, first of all CONGRATS on making some SERIOUS progress. And thanks for the genuine props on the eBook.

And CONGRATS on the EPIPHANY.
Get ready for the dominos to start falling, one after another, as from this epiphany each realization leads to further massive realizations. And if you think the eBook is awesome, just wait till you get to the CD set!!!!!

Let's first go over what you did RIGHT in your interaction at the party:

1. You GOT your butt OUT of the house. Seriously, this IS a huge thing. If you're used to NOT taking action, it can take huge inertia to draw up the wherewithal to overcome all the negative voices in your mind telling you to continue to do nothing so that you avoid any potential emotional pain.

(Even though of course, not taking action leads to more emotional pain, but the brain has a funny way of not thinking long term and wanting to just avoid the short term pain, so this is why I say congrats on overcoming that.)

2. You TOOK the ball and RAN with it. When she came to you and essentially OPENED YOU UP, (which by the way could be an interesting strategy of opening up girls at a party if they ever choose a song you didn't freak out but rather SAW OPPORTUNITY and showed DOMINANCE and VALUE in a way that wasn't mean but was just COOL and made sense.

You were THE MAN!

As you know, of course, it could have been FUNNIER, but it was still SOLID stuff and in fact this was the way I used to run my own game, it was pure dominance and less playful. And it worked really well too, but not as great in clubs/parties where the vibe is pure fun.

But that was years ago when I was still a bit pissed about women, so I wasn't congruent with the playful stuff right off the bat.

However, the sooner you get the playful vibe CONGRUENT to your personality, the better. Out with the chips on our shoulders, they do nothing for us or the chicks in our lives. Use the past as useful lessons, not as misery fuel.

Dominance should be MIXED with playfulness.

3. You teased her and built up the FUN vibes AND the tension (not giving into her, keeping things challenging but in a fun way), (although let us know next time the exact teases you gave!)

4. You ENJOYED her challenges, you didn't get offended or insecure, you "GOT IT" as they say. You have developed to the point that you are internally strong enough to ENJOY this. Good stuff, and a very attractive trait to the super hottest of women who "get it" too.

5. You enjoyed the party in general and socialized with plenty of other girls too. You were doing what you SHOULD be doing at a party- having fun by being in the right state. Otherwise, what the heck is a guy doing at a party. If he is ONLY there desperately looking for chicks, it's faar from the best vibe. It's like the guy has no sense of FUN, it's also like he is a pure taker. He is not adding to the vibe, he just is all too serious looking for chicks.

Okay, now, here's where you could IMPROVE:

1. Even though you did a good job of running with the ball when it was presented to you, you don't want to RELY on women opening YOU up for ANY reason. Yes, women open up guys for various reasons, and there are things you can do to help increase the chances of that like wearing certain crazy types of clothing and accessories as conversation pieces, but you want to be a man of ACTION and not rely on that.

I'm not saying you would rely on that, but I want to make SURE you don't develop a weakness in APPROACHING by looking for ways out of it where women will approach you instead.

The reasons for this are not only practical in the sense of increasing your options of women to choose from, but also internally as well, you don't want to send the message to your brain that you are passive. So take action.

Okay, the next thing to improve:

2. STOP the teasing earlier. Even though it's GREAT to get to that point where you "get" how to tease and enjoy that vibe, you have to TAKE THINGS TO THE NEXT LEVEL by getting "real" as they say.

As I explain in the eBook as well, if you are going to ever proceed to getting physical, you have to develop some TRUST and more solid CONNECTION. A woman can't open up PHYSICALLY usually until she feels there is a much more solid "getting to know you" going on.

This is what comes after teasing. And by the way, teasing is not the ONLY way to establish vibe, but at parties it is usually the best way to go, since the vibe is fun.

The key is to make emotional impact, and fun teasing vibes are very sexual and also fun is very close to pleasure, and that's all close to sex, so it makes sense. But just to prevent any confusion, I want to make it clear that teasing is not the only way to open girls up, what counts is being EMOTIONALLY COMPELLING to her. But that's a whole other story, and I deal with that as well as a TON of other important topics in my CD Mastery Apprenticeship Program.

The next thing to IMPROVE on:

3. You mention you "had difficulty keeping focus because I was having so much fun with her and also the party in general. It was her trying to make eye contact" etc, etc.

Man, you HAVE to focus. What happened is NORMAL when you start. There is so much stimulation happening, and it feels so good, and also you don't want to see it all go down the toilet with a "disappointment" in case you TRY to push to the next level and you get resistance from her. So it gets harder to think, and also you don't want to LOSE that happy state by LOSING.

But what you have to do is REALIZE that success can ONLY be yours if you DO keep pushing. Of course, you do this WISELY, SMOOTHLY, but it will never GET smooth and perfect until you first GET IN THERE and do it not perfectly a few times.

DON'T GET IT PERFECT.
JUST GET IN THERE and WORK IT.

The reality is that most girls are not going to "blow you off" and be rude to you, they are just going to give you some resistance, which is FINE. You can DEAL with that too, as you will learn to finely calibrate your connection building and physical escalation with experience, and with help of the insights, strategies, and tips you get from having the Wizard here as your secret weapon.

And this leads me to the next thing you can improve on:

4. ALWAYS try to take your interaction as far as possible. You mention you had chores and studies, and I believe you, but something tells me that if you knew you could have that fine chicka with you even if it would just be for one hour, you would do it that night.

And the adrenaline rush would be so awesome that you'd have tons of energy for your chores even with less sleep, and then the next night you'd sleep like a baby. Of course, I could be wrong, and also, I DEFINITELY am against any kind of DRIVING when fatigued. So if you were going to have to drive and you would be fatigued, then I totally am with ya there in calling it quits for the night.

I have to point this stuff out because otherwise it's too easy to rationalize to ourselves out of taking full action. I'm giving you the tough love, yo. Because I wanna see you GET the girl next time.

But again, overall, congrats, you are a man of ACTION, especially when you are in an environment of friends who DON'T take action, it takes extra OOMPH to go against the tide.

And if you are reading this right now, and would like to take YOUR results with women to a WHOLE NEW LEVEL, then you ought to download my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women, IMMEDIATELY.

It's at:

http://thedatingwizard.com/ebook.htm

The guy right here in this email got the epiphany after completing the book in two nights. It's real, the kind of thing that charges you up so massively, you can't SLEEP for a couple of nights. Yup, sorry, but that's how powerful it is. In 6 weeks, he was already "getting it" and clearly women who are HOTTIES are seriously INTERESTED in him.

We're talking changing around an entirely wrong way of BEING and thinking that was entrenched into him over his entire LIFE, and yet in 6 weeks, major positive change has already occured.

Now, he just has to learn exactly how to PUSH it farther to the next stage to SEAL THE DEAL. And if it's cool with him, he'll let us know how he's doing soon and let us know his next stage of progress.

Again, to get your FOUNDATION for success to women, download the eBook NOW at:

http://thedatingwizard.com/ebook.htm

And if you have read the eBook and are ready for the NEXT level of success that will BLOW your mind, then you seriously owe it to yourself to take advantage of the three YEARS of blood, sweat and tears I put into my advanced CD program that I have just completed this summer:

The Seduction Mastery Apprenticeship Program CD Series.

This program is the most advanced resource around, PERIOD, on how to pick up ANY woman, how to approach, how to generate ALL the emotions required from first seeing her all the way to getting under the covers, and much MUCH more. It redefines the very meaning of attraction.

It's at:

http://thedatingwizard.com/seductionmastery.htm

And if you want to learn this as FAST as possible, then maybe it's time you invested in yourself in a way that will pay off dividends for you for the rest of your LIFE by experiencing the 3 Day Ultra-Intense BOOTCAMP.

For three days, you will learn DIRECTLY from me, (your Bootcamp will consist of no other students and no other instructors, all my focus will be on YOU) HANDS ON in the FIELD, about EVERYTHING you need to know to pickup most effectively in every different type of situation.

You will learn by seeing DEMONSTRATION, you will learn also by DOING it yourself as I coach you and provide you with immediate real time feedback to sharpen your every move, and you will learn by having every single facet of pickup from A to Z broken down for you so that you can DO it yourself.

To sign up or to find out more, go to:


http://www.singlescafe.net/real-world-of-dating.html?authorname=The%20Dating%20Wizard

3 Things Men Can't Resist in a Woman

1) A Woman Who Smiles (More powerful than you might realize)

A woman who smiles makes it easier for a man to approach her by conveying an attitude of confidence and playfulness. Since many women are fearful of giving men the "wrong impression" they frequently guard their smiles. While that approach is safer, it inadvertently sends the message of being someone who is overly cautious.

In addition, smiling is a sign of acceptance. Men often need some signal that it is safe to approach a woman before there're willing to a risk introduction themselves (unless they are intoxicated).

2) A Woman who Listens (and doesn't dominate the conversation)

Men rarely get listened to, at least not beyond a few minutes. Most of the time that is all men really need, but since most men hate to be rejected, it is easier for them to keep conversations superficial. They expect most women to want to talk rather than be willing to listen.

If they happen to meet a woman who listens with her eyes (looks at him while he's talking) as well as her ears, they are intrigued. Then, if she continues to listen and not take over the conversation, well, that's the kind of woman that men can't resist, and eventually marry.

3) A Woman who dresses Feminine (Men are REALLY visual)

Everyone knows that men are visual but women often forget just how helpless guys are to what they see. The right visual stimulation can hypnotize a man. Women hear this and often become fearful because the mistakenly believe that men only notice perfect women.

Forget Perfect! If you really want to be noticed by men think colors, dresses and curves. Men basically like any woman who has that soft and cuddly quality. It isn't that men don't find women attractive in pants or when they are dressed comfortably, it's that they don't notice them as easily. It doesn't catch their eye like earrings or long hair does.

Conversely, a powerfully dressed woman (think lots of red) makes most men think of sex, or not notice her at all. She may have a soft side, but if men can't see it, they often don't know it exist. The more feminine (softer) a woman dresses; the more men she will attract.


http://www.singlescafe.net/things-men-can-not-resist.html?authorname=Bob%20Grant,%20L.P.C.

Flirting Tips For Guys

Most women are really good at flirting and know how to do it, but when it comes to guys, they usually have no clue. Here are 16 different flirting tips for guys that will help you get the girl.

The key is that you want to be competitive with women, but playfully competitive. If you can manage this, you will be more successful with women than you ever thought you could be.

16 Flirting Tips to Memorize

  1. When she says that she is a good girl, tell her you only like bad girls.
  2. When you are playing a game, make a bet on the outcome. Cheat if you have to win!
  3. When you are watching a movie, throw popcorn at her.
  4. When she is lying down, tickle her arms, legs and stomach.
  5. When she tells you she likes a shirt, tell her that you think it looks terrible.
  6. When she says she wants to go home, tell her that you don't want to go home with her, because you hardly know her. Imply that she is a bad girl.
  7. When she says something is cool, give her a weird look.
  8. When she is sitting next to you on the bed, give her a push off of it.
  9. When she sits down next to you, scoot away from her.
  10. When she is talking to you, take the hat right off of her head, and don't give it back.
  11. When she tries to convince you that she is cool, call her a dork.
  12. When she does something (anything!), stick your tongue out at her.
  13. When she says something is ugly, tell her how much you like it.
  14. When she says that she likes a particular actor, claim that she has a crush on him.
  15. When she puts her hand on your leg, give her a strange look like she is coming on to you.
  16. When she does something embarrassing, act like you are going to walk away.

Why These Tips Work

If you are confused, don't worry! Here's why these tips work.

Women communicate indirectly. This means that when she hits you or teases you, it actually means that she likes you and wants to learn more about you.

Don't stop being competitive with her. You can't do too much of this, so don't worry. If you keep up this emotion, you'll have her interested in your mystery.

Don't say that you are sorry. If you tell her that she looks dorky in that shirt one minute and then apologize for it a second later, you are going to lose the interest she is giving you really quickly.

Why shouldn't you apologize? The second that you say you are sorry, you lose a bit of the interest and intrigue that she had for you. If she starts wanting you to compliment her by asking you if her hair looks good, don't act impressed. She's testing you to see if you are just putting on an act.

What to Say?

Another of the important flirting tips for guys is that there is nothing that is right to say. Every guy has a different style, and it is up to you to find out what your style is.

When you are talking to her, a woman is looking for some of the personality traits that she wants in a man. When you realize this, you will be able to come up with great conversations. Remember, that you want to show your confidence of what you are saying when you are talking to a woman.

Don't forget that there are many other factors that will determine if a girl is interested in you or not. Here are some of the reasons a girl may not be interested in guys:

  • Has just gotten out of a bad relationship
  • Be sick of dating, and want a break from everyone.
  • Be dating someone else
  • Not be attracted to guys

Believe me when I say that you really learn a lot more when a conversation or flirting attempt on a beautiful woman goes wrong. What you need to do is get a journal and write down how each interaction went, so you can learn from your mistakes and track your progress.

The best of the flirting tips for guys is to always act playfully competitive when you are talking to women. If you can manage this, you will be able to get women to be attracted to you.


http://www.singlescafe.net/flirting-tips-for-guys.html?authorname=Chris%20Williamson



How To Get a Girl To Fall in Love With You

If you can't stop thinking about her, her name gives you chills and your heart pounds every time you see her, you are in love. Now, it is important to ensure that you know how to get a girl to fall in love with you and keep her. There are some important steps in making sure that you get her and keep her. Consider this article your wake up call.

Connecting With People

It is important to build healthy relationships with others. Especially the girl of your dreams. There is a little thing called rapport and you should take the definition very seriously. Rapport is an open, positive and healthy way of communicating with another person. This type of relationship is not only important with your girl, but also everyone else in your life as well.

Those that are good at building rapport will have an excellent relationship with others. The way that you establish this kind of relationship with your love is to keep a playful flirtation going while you share information with her. This way you are making her feel good and enhancing the sexual attraction as well as letting her into your heart. This is important to women, you have to share secrets with them.

The Biggest Mistake Guys In Love Make

Most men develop a rapport with a woman based on a friendship first, which often times fails miserably. You want to capitalize on that sexual attraction, then work on being friends as well. Never start as "just friends" it sends the wrong message and then the woman does not want to lose her friend by becoming your girlfriend. So, avoid this deadly trap at all costs.

How to get a girl to fall in love with you is simple. It is a mix of flirting, sharing and staying with it. Another common mistake is that men will give up at the first sign of any problem. Do not give up. Lay on the flirting tactfully, but heavily. Make sure that she knows you are interested and build that attraction.

Another common mistake is that men will have a lack of words and conversation pieces so they turn to demographics, which is a conversation killer. Share personal information with her such as hobbies, interests, dreams and what you are hoping for in 5 years, but never bore her. Keep her enticed by showing her your playful personality, great communication skills and best of all your indulgence in her. So to recap, keep the flirting, keep the personal conversation and lose the demographics.

Getting A Women Fall In Love With You

Hopefully you have already established a flirtation that has led to a sexual attraction on her part. If not, you may need to try something new. If she is unresponsive, it may be because she is desirable and you have lots of competition with other men. You may need to move on to dating someone else, learning the ropes in the mean time. By dating other women that have similar qualities you are learning. This will help and also it will make you look more desirable, and that is what women like. They want something that is in demand, so don't be too easy or answering her every beck and call.

When you have moved on, she will feel as if she has lost you. This will spark her interest and she may begin pursuing you. This will let her know that you are much more than someone's friend. You are a hot guy that others desire!

The Skill Of Attracting Women

Attracting a woman is an ongoing process. It is a building process and does not happen over night. First, establishing a good solid flirty relationship, let her know that you are interested. Flirting peaks sexual desire! Second, keep the interest by sharing personal information with her, let her in a bit. And, lastly do not run at the first thing, keep trying, hang in there. Soon you will find that you have mastered how to get a girl to fall in love with you.


http://www.singlescafe.net/get-girl-love-you.html?authorname=Chris%20Williamson

Tips On How To Talk To Girls

If men think that sucking up is the best tips on how to talk to girls, they have another thing coming. Most men will take on a flat effect leaving their conversation dull. The woman will assume that the man is only making conversation and not truly interested in her. In worse cases she may think that you are kissing up, which is even more detrimental.

Approaching a woman can be hard enough, but to keep the conversation going can be harder. But, there are things that can make it easier. Read on to find out how to have a good time which is the key to talking with girls.

Conversation Mistakes

When men are around their friends they almost always have a good time. Why is this? Because when they are around other men they cut up and have a good time. They tell jokes and don't worry about saying or doing the wrong thing.

When men are around women they often become more serious and begin taking the situation very seriously. Laughing and joking stops out of the fear of saying the wrong thing or looking stupid to the woman. This causes the man to lose his creativity and become boring. This reservation makes the man seem not interesting at all.

When men stop the laughing and joking so does the flirtation, which is not a good thing. Flirting is a very important part of the tips on how to talk to girls. Playing around is a part of keeping her interested.

Why Do Men Act Differently Around Women?

A mans behavior changes around women because they are afraid of saying the wrong thing. This can cause their creativity and flirtation to end resulting in a "boring" male.

When men are nervous they generally can't even think of what to say. It is hard to have a good and interesting conversation if you can not find some common ground to talk about. Those that are watching everything they say find it difficult to have a good conversation. It is best to pay attention to your words and comments, but the most important thing is to be yourself and have a good time. Remember these tips:

It is acceptable to be cautious, but do not watch your every word. If you are too cautious you become boring and risk losing the girl anyway. Keep a light hearted attitude and have a good time. Try not to worry so much that you don't know what to say. BE YOURSELF!

The Media Is Sending the Wrong Message

There is always a Mr. Right in the movies that does everything wrong in the beginning. But, quickly redeems himself with roses, a love song and some quirky actions. Basically he begs her back or serenades her until she falls in love with him. How accurate is this?

Not very effective at all, as everyday people we can not go around singing to each other or skipping down the street. The break out singing at the restaurant is great in fantasy land, but not true to real life. Though these actions will get a response from her you must be careful about it also. You don't want her to feel that you are childish or manipulative. Women have radars for manipulative men.

Talking To Women Effectively

If you can remember back to childhood you will remember good times. That is because those were the times that you were allowed to play, horse around and not worry with it. It did not matter if you said or did something silly, that was the point. You may have hide toys, called names or wrestled in the floor, anything to get a good laugh.

Many times after growing up people stop playing around for fear of others looking at them negatively. What many do not realize is that this play attitude is a form of flirting and is very important in any relationship. This builds sexual tension and allows for you to appear confident and fun to be around.

Worry more about finding that playful side of yourself then tips on how to talk to girls will come easy. If you find this area of your personality the rest will come naturally. Creativity and ability comes from that uninhibited area of your person, find it!

http://www.singlescafe.net/how-to-talk-to-girls.html?authorname=Chris%20Williamson



Meeting Older Women

If you're a guy looking to have a good time with women, and you've been focusing on the "younger generation" of females out there, you might be surprised to find that you're actually missing out on a LOT of great potential relationships.

In these modern times, older women are becoming more and more an option for guys looking to enter the dating scene. Whether the girl is a couple years older than you, or a full blown "cougar" looking for a hot stud, you have some great, un-tapped options.

See, there are lots of very "career-focused" women out there nowadays who have achieved some level of success with their businesses and are now looking to find love. There are also women who have gotten divorces and now find themselves open to meeting new men. Whatever the case, the number of available older women is growing.

And for the typical man who's open to dealing with more "experienced" women, this couldn't be better news.

So here's the real question...

Are you interested in dating a woman who's older than you are?

Do you find older women more attractive than their younger counterparts?

Well, my friend, you are not alone!

Older women are much more "mature" and experienced in the ways of love. They've usually had a lot of practice dealing with men, and know their way around the bedroom.

They can also be MUCH easier to deal with than younger women, who can tend to be a little "high maintenance."

If you're a man in your mid-to-late 20s who's mostly been with women in their late teens and early 20s, dating a woman in her 40s can be a real treat for you!

They tend to be more mature and less selfish - sexually, and in just about every other way - than the women you're used to dating. And if you're not looking for anything serious, the chances are higher that they're not either, if they're just past child-bearing age.

In that way, they're kind of like a lot of women in their mid-20s and younger, who don't feel compelled to start a family in the way that single women who've hit 28 or 29 do. By the time a single woman reaches that age range, she's more likely to feel that now's the time to act if she's ever going to have children.

That's because she's not getting any younger, and she feels less attractive than she was when she was in her early 20s. In her mind, it's only going to get harder to find a great man she can settle down with.

(By the way, a lot of women at this stage make a mistake that a lot of men make their entire lives: they get desperate. Some women actually repel men because of their desire to get into a serious relationship sooner than the man is comfortable with. And a lot of women at this stage will settle for a man who they're not compatible with, but who will end up fulfilling their need to have a family.)

So how can you start meeting older women?

The first place I'd start looking to meet older women is on the internet.

Yes, it's true. I didn't stutter. I'd say that 90% of the older women you'd like to meet are online.

Understand that many single, older women either have kids or work (or both).

This means that they don't really have time to go to "traditional" places to meet men, like bars or clubs.

So hitting up websites like Match.com, eHarmony, and even MySpace can be a great way to meet these older women, since they tend to use these sites often.

Other good ways of meeting older women are to go to places you'd know to find them! So avoid that trendy bar or club, because you'd usually find these women at more laid back places.

Coffee shops in the morning and afternoon are good places to meet older women, simply because there are the places women stop on their way to and from work.

You can also meet older women just going throughout your day - be it at lunch, at the mall, shopping for groceries, or whatever it may be.

But there are problems with dating older women. You may not be as mature as she is, which can be a problem for both of you. And the age difference can become rather awkward should you decide to get married: If there's a 15-year age difference between you, then she'll be 50 when you're 35!

But that's not to say that you shouldn't meet and date an older woman. It can be a great experience for you, if you're aware of the potential issues that can arise in the relationship.

Honestly, the art of meeting and dating older women could fill a book, and unfortunately, I just don't have the time to go as much into detail with this as I would like.

So if you're interested in learning more about how to meet and date older women (or just women in general), then I would highly recommend you sign up for my free How To Meet Women crash course.

No where else on the internet will you find such a detailed and comprehensive resource - for free, no less - on how to meet and date the women of your dreams.

I will show you all the secrets you need to know on how to overcome your anxiety of approaching women, and how to not get rejected - EVER - so you can actually have FUN meeting and dating women instead of feeling like its a chore.


http://www.singlescafe.net/meeting-older-women.html?authorname=Joseph%20Matthews

Friday, June 29, 2007

Matchmaker Looking for Wife

Adult Dating Expert Seeks Sexy But Down to Earth Woman in Vancouver

Single and need help finding Mr. or Mrs. Right? This woman can help you find the perfect match

On-line dating and matchmaking have become a huge business. It seems people have almost given up on meeting their significant other through old fashion dating and meeting people sporadically. With the influx of dating services available, help is certainly out there.

In Vancouver, Canada, matchmaker Janis Spindel has been hired by a Canadian millionaire to find his perfect wife. He’s looking for a woman who is “28 years or older, very attractive, well-educated, sophisticated yet understated, upscale and professional… non-smokers, athletically inclined and looking for a committed relationship” (The Vancouver Courier, 2007).

What he offers in return is a breathtaking home, a high profile husband in his 40’s who is a self-made millionaire and is from Vancouver. The search continues after Vancouver as Janis also scouts potential wives in Victoria and Seattle.

The Janis Spindel Serious Matchmaking services are a pretty penny, usually hired by only those who have small fortunes, or are willing to pay a small fortune. Her fees start at $100,000, but her services are kept exclusive.

She boasts a high success rate, matching 760 couples into matrimony, with 40 more in preparation of walking down the isle. She has been in business for 15 years and only sees the market growing in the future.

Spindel holds a highly protected list of exceptional women in a database, who are looking for Mr. Right. They would have paid $1,000 for a 30-minute interview to be included in this catalogue. They could have also gone the less expensive route by having an interview with one of her assistants, putting them back $500.

The company also holds events like the signature intimate dinners, where singles mingle with other singles. 16 men and 16 women are invited to dine on a rotating four course meal and find their match.

If you are interested in putting yourself out there for this Canadian millionaire, here are the rules:

- be living in Vancouver, Victoria or Seattle

- apply by calling Spindel’s office to arrange a pre-screening interview (212- 987-1582)

- meet with Janis at the Sutton Place Hotel on June 21, 22 or 23rd

Think you have what it takes to be the “chosen” wife?


http://dating-services.suite101.com/article.cfm/matchmaker_looking_for_wife

Finding Your Soul Mate with Online Matchmaking Services

Online matchmaking is hot. The continual growth in popularity of online matchmaking services has even some its harshest critics take a step back and say, "Well, looks like it works after all."

Indeed, the advantages of online matchmaking over other tried-and-not-so-true methods of meeting a mate, such as singles bars, blind dates, supermarkets and so on are undeniable and varied. These advantages include:

1. Matching: On many matchmaking sites you answer questions and specify what you are looking for in a mate. You can be very specific as to what you like and dislike, what you must have and what you cannot stand, and anything in between.

2. Convenience: You can search and communicate with prospective candidates at any time of the day or night.

3. Numbers: There are millions of people from whom to choose, of different ages, ethnicities, backgrounds, religions and geographical locations.

4. Interacting: While some people can say the right thing at the right time, some of us get the right ideas long after the fact. In online matchmaking, you have all the time to create opening lines or think up appropriate responses.

Exchanging email, instant/text messages, chatting, and phone calls help further in finding the right match as well as weeding out those who are incompatible to you or with whom you are uncomfortable.

5. Put Your Best Foot Forward: In online matchmaking you can broadcast your best talents and qualities by creating a profile that touches on all the interesting elements that make the real you.

6. Privacy: Online matchmaking services provide easy-to-use features as well as an environment that lets you communicate while maintaining your anonymity. You can remain anonymous until you are ready to reveal more about yourself to the right person.

You also get to check out any number of potential mates without their ever knowing you took a peek.

7. Familiarity: You get to "know" the people who seem promising before meeting in person. This eliminates the awkwardness of first introductions. You also have an idea of what your prospective mate looks like, as you will have exchanged photos.

8. Minimizing risk: Meeting strangers in bars, clubs and other similar places carries an element of risk. Though risk cannot be entirely eliminated in online matchmaking you can maintain safety with caution and commonsense. The fact that you have been communicating with the person for some time minimizes risk as you already know the person to a certain extent.

All in all, online matchmaking services offer many advantages over other dating methods. A reputable service can offer you a way to meet lots of compatible singles who are also looking for serious partners. Reputable matchmaking sites offer free trials.

http://www.terrysarticles.com/articledetail.php?artid=27333&catid=260&title=Finding+Your+Soul+Mate+with+Online+Matchmaking+Services

Letting Go of the Divine Matchmaker

Some relationships end with a bang. Mine ended with a whimper.
I had been manipulated, lied to, and now, ignominiously -- via e-mail, "I think we should just be buddies" -- dumped. Pain, uncertainty, and rejection overwhelmed me until, as I cried myself to sleep again one night, I recalled a phrase that brought momentary comfort.
"The Lord will hear when I call to Him." It was Psalm 4:3, my psalm. Each child in my second-grade Sunday school class had received a slip of paper with a different Bible verse to memorize. Our teacher promised us that it would always be our very own to use when we most needed it. A sort of verse kept behind glass: Break in case of emergency.

So that night,

I used my special psalm in desperation. Please, Lord, take the hurt away and don't ever let it return. I will wait as long as it takes. Just let the next guy be The One.

God had taken me seriously
Six long years later, still single, celibate, and waiting, I could only assume that God had taken me seriously. We had a pact. Granted, it wasn't exactly the covenant God made with Noah or Moses. But if He wasn't making me wait for The One, surely I would have met someone, anyone by now.
That was just one of the flaws in my thinking. And I'm not alone. Many people treat God like a divine matchmaker, believing that He has one soul mate destined for them. All that is required is to sit back passively and wait for the assigned match to appear. But God isn't a yenta. And we are awfully dull prizes if we sit around putting our lives on hold while waiting for The One.
Many people treat God like a divine matchmaker, believing that He has one soul mate destined for them.

I was initially confused when I met my next boyfriend. He was funny, charming, and smart. But how could a man who wears turquoise polo shirts, mocks my college sports team, and dislikes mashed potatoes be The One? Sure, a small part of my rational mind argued that my "pact" with God wasn't exactly binding; there was no reason to assume that this new man was my future husband. On the other hand, if the matchmaking arrangement was all in my head,

why had I gone years without a hand to hold or a shoulder to lean on? To justify all of the lonely weekends to myself, I had to believe that this man was my reward.

I had a complaint
So I stood dumbstruck in a cold parking lot on our third date as my chosen prince explained that he would really like to spend more time with me, but he should probably tell me that he was seeing someone else. As he transmogrified into a weasel before my spurned eyes, I called to the Lord again. This time, I had a complaint:
"I don't know what kind of matchmaking service you're running, but this is unacceptable. I held up my end of the deal, and, frankly, I expect a little better than this."

Even after so many years, it was very easy to fall back into the trough of pain and rejection, to wallow in self-pity and lash out at God for abandoning me and our deal. But what was this deal essentially? A win-win situation for me. I didn't have to put myself at risk and cope with any of the hurt that is a part of all human relationships, and in return God would present me with my future husband. Hmm. I thought of my date -- just a nice guy who found himself in the confusing situation of meeting a woman who intrigued him while he was still dating someone else. Not exactly a capital crime.

Asking for guidance
I decided to give both my date and God a second chance. I prayed, issuing no commands and negotiating no deals, but simply asking for guidance. "Lord, I don't know if he's The One. And it doesn't really matter right now. Just help me through this. Please help me to enjoy this and remember that, regardless of the outcome, I will be your child, I will be loved, I will be all right."
God does hear me when I call to Him, but I no longer think that He has one perfect match reserved for me. And that's acceptable. Because while my pact was imaginary, I will always have the pact God made with all of His children: "Lo, I am with you always, even to the very end of the age." Or relationships.
Want more spiritual relationships articles? Check out Beliefnet.com


http://dating.personals.yahoo.com/singles/spiritualdating/6/letting-go-of-the-divine-matchmaker

Make It Happen With Your Dating Website

What do we do after we have dating software running smoothly ?
Let me tell you my point of view:
After trying different and lots of things in life I realized that the network is the more important thing that I can achieve.
If you a network you kind have all: Status, Power and Money.

So how do I make the dating website do that?
The Datetopia Match Agency BiZ - Dating Software solution has the same problem as any top line product: It can't return your investment if you don't use it!

So how do I use it?
You have to use in real life the power provided to you by the dating website on the internet.

“Hey, the Match Agency BiZ software only runs the website. It can not give you powers for the real life!”
These are sentence that you might hear in the beginning. You'd normally hear it from people (even friends) that don't have the time to invested in them. So if you hear such a sentence make sure to also notice the envy that comes with it. What they're actually saying is something like that:
“I really admire you for having started to invest in you. Still I don't like it that you'll have all the credits and I'll get the same old, boring job!”

Getting back to our business…

“In about 1 year, 6 month if you advertise, you can make … What would you like to achieve?”
I'll only make some suggestions:
• money from memberships
• money from ad space, newsletters, affiliate sales on the website
• a speed dating event with the dating website members
• a member meeting to create a network
• a party
• open a bar, club with the website theme (and invite your members )

And the possibilities don't stop here! Create your own network of powerful men and women that do business in your location (start of course with the ones from the dating business).
How do I do that?
In about 3 month (the timeframe depends upon how much you target the visitors, advertise or invest in SEO services ) you'll have enough traffic on your website so that it can open interesting doors for you.
And these doors open by talking to the ones that are already acting in the field.
An example is to talk to the one's that make events in the dating area. Sure probably in the beginning but a free ticket for a banner on your site it almost a certainty!

The important part in this “make it happen” situation is not that you win the money for the ticket. Think that when entering that event you will have STATUS! Use it. You are somebody who knows the business and the organizers.

Don't forget about the business cards. Remember to read my article in the webmaster area to remember how to use it efficiently.

So my advice is to: “Make it happen !!!”


http://www.datetopia.com/article.php?t=Make%20It%20Happen%20With%20Your%20Dating%20Website


How to Build a Niche Matchmaking Website?

What is a matchmaking website?
A matchmaking website brings the next level in classifieds, making the search possible in 2 ways. A standard classifieds website presents item profiles and visitors browse and search the website for the items they want. A matchmaking website allows keeping records both for the items and searchers, sometimes these 2 beeing very similar as in dating websites. This is much more effective as the search can be done from both ways. The software that powers a matchmaking website can also automatically find the searched items based on predefined criteria. Advanced matchmaking software allows multiple types of item profile types to match.

This type of software can be used, in addition to standard dating websites, for building various niche matchmaking websites matching (Free ideas!):

  • photographers, makeup artists, hair stylists and models
  • couples and singles
  • tatoo artists and customers
  • casinos and gamblers
  • pets
  • pets for sale and pet lovers
  • projects and freelancers
  • domains (on sale and wanted)
  • websites (on sale and wanted)
  • secondhand electronics (on sale and wanted)
  • jobs and employees
  • deals and investors
  • used cars (on sale and wanted)
  • tuning shops and car owners
  • travel resorts and tourists
  • realestates (on sale and wanted)
  • collectibles and colectors

What do you need to build this type of website fast and with an affordable investment?
You basicly need a very customizable commercial package that provides the main features and a freelance designer edit the settings and design for your niche website.

All Datetopia Match Agency based package include 100% customizable profile types and attributes (so you can create wing, customer profiles), custom member rights, custom membership types, customizable templates. For most features and plugins, the most powerful package we recommend is Software for Dating which includes blogs, search engine optimization tools, a fms web based videochat plugin and many more additional plugins.

Where to find freelancers?
Submit a Freelance Project on Scriptlance

This is the best way to build a niche website with affordable investment: use a commercial highly customizable package for the main features and affordable freelance work for the minor customizations you need, as development from stratch takes a long time (months or even years) and huge amounts of money. Datetopia develops dating software since 2002, and the currently available packages are the result of years of work, feedback and optimizations.

http://www.datetopia.com/article.php?t=How%20To%20Build%20A%20Niche%20Matchmaking%20Website

Start Your Own Business - An Online Dating Service

What exactly means having your own business ?

To own a business means having a lot of advantages as a result of a small investment.
What you should know is that: your advantages are exponentially related to the amount of money invested.

Let me point out the biggest advantage which is: being your own boss.
Does this sound familiar?
- Bosses have no time for explanations and therefore they indicate what is right?
- Work, work, work always so others can enjoy their freedom?
- You have no power in the decision making process?
- And there’s always the thought that you CAN do BETTER!
Making this last phrase become true is only a few clicks away!

You will receive answers for some important questions:

1. Where did my life go by starting my own business?
In time, you will become your own MANAGER. This is probably one of the most important decisions you’ll take in your entire life. Usually society avoids offering its members the opportunity to take such a decision. This happens naturally since almost everybody is interested in finding an employee and not an equal fellow citizen. Hmm... interesting!!!

2. Why did I decide for a dating website?
The big advantage is that you’ll see how things go in this area. That means that you’ll find out how you can keep a good relation going and especially how can you NOT create a relationship ( almost 80% of the earth’s population act more towards not creating a relationship ).
Practically speaking, managing a dating website will help you get a better picture of human relations and will improve your social life.

Q: What will I get for me with these ?
A: STATUS.
The first thing, after purchasing and installing the software, should be: create your own business cards. ( decide who you want to be, because in your own company/business you can be anything you like ! ). And another think that you should take in consideration: “So many options have appeared only by purchasing a dating software!” ( You’d better get used with the idea, the multiple options idea, because it will happen often ).

Q: What will people feel when they meet me?
A: INSTANT ATTRACTION.
First of all the business cards will make you different. The fact that you are acting in such a delicate field will create the image of somebody who owns status, power, information; somebody who knows what she/he wants. (However you’d better give it a real try instead of just reading these words!!! )

I recommend the latest version of Match Agency BiZ - Dating Software . That means that you will have the benefit provided by the 3 years of experience from the Datetopia dating software development team. This software is created to satisfy all the needs required for a good niche dating website. Just take a look at the features provided by this software package ( You can also find here a price and feature comparison between MAB and other similar software packages. We did this for you so you can save time! ) : Compare Match Agency BiZ with Other Good Dating Software Packages .

Q: Are there any other advantages that could arise from my collaboration with Datetopia?
A: One of our mottos is: “No matter how good our software is, we will bring something even better in the market in 1 to 3 months”.
Currently our ongoing projects include developing the service part in the dating area. The target of this project is to satisfy your members.

Q: What do we mean by services?
The new packages contain: articles, courses, newsletters and a helping guide for the website end users.
In other words the purpose of the service is to attract and satisfy your users.

Last but not least I’m giving you some clues about the main topics:
• NLP ( Neuro-Linguistic Programming )
• Communication skills
• Manipulation
• Seduction
• Persuasive techniques
• Dating examples ( how to … )

We are making all this efforts so that you can say very soon:
“All that’s left for me to do in this business is to make sure that I take my money on time !!!”


http://www.datetopia.com/article.php?t=Start%20Your%20Own%20Business%20An%20Online%20Dating%20Service


In Pursuit of Native American Singles

One of the most public manifestations of race is the choice of a spouse. Today, native american singles join millions of other people that use personals ads to find their perfect match. Whether looking for native americans, or someone from another race, many online services offer native american singles a way to explore dating options.

One of the most public manifestations of race is the choice of a spouse. This very personal decision can produce a lot of discussion and discourse for many native american singles. These days it is not uncommon to see two people of different racial or ethnic backgrounds walking hand in hand. However, many people still think it's wrong to date outside one's race, or have somehow reasoned that some ethnic groups are okay to intermix while others are not. Why is this topic so important to people? Could it simply be a fear of cultures they are not familiar with?

Like other racial groups, native americans are often interested in meeting someone outside of their cultural circle, but are not ready to deal with the social taboos brought on by family and friends. Today, native american singles join millions of other people that use personals ads to find their perfect match.

One way for native american singles to explore dating options without having to worry about societal pressures, is to join an online dating community. Hundreds of websites are there waiting, designed specifically to break down the racial barriers that often prevent people of different cultures from establishing relationships. There is so much to learn and share in a multicultural bond. The options available for choosing the right soul mate are something many native american singles seeking interracial partners may find useful. For instance, you can set up a free profile and search for other people of a particular race who have similar interests. Privacy and safety is a case for concern for anyone exploring a relationship through online services, and membership for many of these websites include precautions such as background checks.

Sometimes native american singles are looking to meet other american indians. For a number of individuals, the attraction to familiar physical traits, and having shared cultural experiences is important in finding a long-term relationship. There also exist several websites designed to help create that native american dating connection. Of course, a number of people portray themselves falsely in personal advertisements, and there is no way to verify native american heritage through this medium. Some sites may offer links to DNA testing centers that purport the ability to determine true indian bloodlines for a price. However, these genetic tests are a hoax, for there is no american indian gene that traces individuals back to particular tribes. The best way for native american singles to determine if someone they are interested in truly is of native decent is through conversation about tradition, family, and other aspects of the culture that only other native americans would have experienced. These are important topics to explore, as they are commonly some of the reasons people seek others of similar background in the first place.

Regardless of whether looking for a multicultural or same race relationship, native american dating can be accomplished through online resources. Each day is a present full of mystery and delight at discovering something new about the person you grow to love, and sharing with them something more about you.


http://articles.syl.com/inpursuitofnativeamericansingles.html

Find Your American Christian Soul Mate

American Christian dating services, personals, and groups are an awesome way to meet people on the same page with you, spiritually speaking. Why not meet some great people that just so happen to be the same denomination as you? This article speaks on the variety of possibilities available for those, who determine themselves to be Christian Singles.

American Christian groups are very popular; they have groups or organizations in just about every area - starting from reading groups and straight to the dating personals. American Christian dating organizations have become even more popular as dating services have seemed to gain popularity, as well. American Christians can now take comfort in the knowledge that they can date or get to know people who have the same spiritual beliefs as they do. For a lot of people, having the questions about religion and spirituality out of the way takes a lot of pressure off, letting them relax and just be themselves early on into the courtship.

American Christians have their own dating personals in newspapers and flyers, online websites, and even local American Christian dating services. Personals printed in a newspaper are great because they allow you to read through them and select a person who sounds suitable for you. While the whole printed personal thing is a bit old fashioned it's still one of the most popular ways to meet other singles. Online websites for American Christians are relatively new, but they are quick, convenient, and allow the two individuals to exchange any number of emails before actually meeting or speaking on the phone. Browsing through various profiles online will allow you to pick some who seems like the perfect match, and may also allow you to see pictures of the applicants! American Christian dating services aren't quite as common, but they are around and if you take a peek inside your phone book you'd be surprised how many Christian dating services are available.

American Christian dating services will often split the personal ads or profiles into specific denominations such as American Baptist, American Lutheran, or American Methodist. Sorting the personal ads by denomination really is the best way to match up American Christian singles who want someone who really is on the same page as them spiritually. Of course, it can be difficult with denominations such as the Lutheran church because they have more than one synod or type of church within the denomination, but overall their beliefs are the same and a good match is more probable.

American Christian dating groups are another popular way to meet other Christians seeking relationships. A lot of churches, such as large American Baptist and other large churches, have their own singles groups that meet once a week or once a month. Singles groups are a great way to socialize and get out of the house without feeling like a third wheel, but also has the potential to meet someone that you'll really connect with. These outings are great because you're with a group of people, so there is no pressure to converse with someone you don't find to your liking, or someone that you're simply not interested in.

American Christians are just like everyone else, looking for fun, love, romance, and a potentially serious relationship. Dating personals, groups, and websites are great ways to meet new people at your own pace no matter who you are and what your spiritual beliefs are!

http://articles.syl.com/findyouramericanchristiansoulmate.html

African American Christian Singles: Triple the Difficulty

African American Christian singles can find dating tough when it is their desire to date within their race and religion. As difficult as this can be, it is certainly not impossible. By seeking out the proper resources and sticking to your guns, you as an African American Christian can find your perfect date. Seek help from the internet, from Christian print magazines, and from the officials in your local church.

American Christian singles of any minority heritage may find dating difficult. If you are an African American Christian in America today, it can be very challenging to find a date with someone of your background and religious faith. Not every African American Christian finds it necessary to date another African American Christian, but if you are one who does, it can make dating difficult, but certainly not impossible.

The challenge of being an American Christian single at all can be very trying at times, and when you narrow the field of possible dates more you are challenging yourself. Again, though, it is not impossible. Perhaps the best way for African American Christians to find a date is through the many web dating services in existence. Most of them have sections for American Christian Singles, and many also allow you to choose the race you want to date.

Of course to narrow things even more, you can always seek out the many American Christian Singles sites out there. These are just like the general singles sites out there, except the target for the Christian dater and his or her needs in terms of finding a mate of similar religious beliefs. These sites will often allow you to choose any preference from African American Christians to Native American Christians. Or, if you like, you can simply open it up to any race.

Another option for African American Christian singles who want to find dates are the personal ads in print. There are many Christian magazines out there that offer personal ad space in them. The concept for these publications is the same as with the internet sites, but simply in a different forum.

Yet a third option for finding dates in the African American Christian community is through your church. Ask your pastor or other church leaders about possible groups or member services your church may offer. If you are in a smaller church, or one that does not have such a group, you can always take the initiative to start one yourself. Whether your church consists of a mix of races and cultures, or anything from African American Christians to Native American Christians, such a group is often a welcome addition to the fellowship.

No matter if you are an American Christian single seeking someone of similar beliefs, or you are just a single person who puts no credence in dating based on religion or race it is important to be cautious. If you take out a personal ad, be sure to leave out information that is too personal. Also, be sure to make your first date public and somewhere that it can be ended if things don't go well. Simple common sense dating advice like this can go a long way in making your dating life happy and healthy.

Dating is difficult. Dating as a Christian is even harder. Dating within a minority race as a Christian can be downright trying. However, it is not impossible, and by using your resources and being patient you can find the right date and hopefully a mate for you. Seek out your favorite website, publication, or church official to put you on the road to dating on your terms.

http://articles.syl.com/africanamericanchristiansinglestriplethedifficulty.html

Great Online Dating for Japanese American Singles

When it comes to finding a mate, Japanese American singles should know that there are many ways to find that someone special if you are searching for another Japanese American as a partner. The Internet changed most people's lives; the growing popularity of online dating changed the lives for the majority of singles. Asian American women and men are finding that online dating services can offer a great way to meet other singles.

Asian American women and men are finding that online dating services can offer a great way to meet other singles. Before the Internet came along, a person who wished to meet another for a possible match and a great date would need to rely on methods that were frustrating. Maybe a friend or family member would arrange a blind date; those never turn out very well. Sometimes a single would sit in a bar for hours on a Saturday night and never find anyone of quality. Once online dating hit the Internet, everything changed. When first introduced, online dating had a bit of a stereotype; some thought it was a sign of desperation; others did not want to have their picture up on the web. This has all changed drastically.

Just about everyone has a friend or family member that has tried or is currently using online dating. When it comes to a Japanese American single, there are many ways to find a match to another Japanese American, if that is what is desired. Most online dating sites offer an element in which a member may search for another using the criteria of ethnic background. Other sites will cater specifically to certain ethnic backgrounds, thou ensuring perfect matches.

Which ever type of site Japanese American single wishes to choose, the guidelines are relatively the same. The first thing for a Japanese American to do is to browse through different sites to see what they offer. Each site will be a bit different, profiles and pictures will be set up differently and profiles will ask different questions. Once a person finds a site that they feel comfortable on, it is time to join. This is very easy and should not be seen as intimidating.

The first step in the process is to create a good solid and fun profile. Most sites, whether a general online dating site of a site catering specially to Japanese American singles, will have an area in which a member will enter information about themselves. This is the time to get a bit creative. It is best to keep profiles short; as most people td onto have time to read very long stories. There will be many profiles, so it is best to add a few interesting details or funny statements to get someone’s attention.

This is also the area in which a Japanese American single can check off which different ethnic types of people they are interested in meeting.

Once the profile is complete, it is best to submit a photograph. Do not be shy. Profiles with pictures are looked at three times as often as profiles that do not have pictures. It is best to send in photos that show you relaxed and not posed. Any photo showing you enjoying a favorite hobby or interest is always great. It is best to include one head shot and one full length body shot. No one needs to look perfect. No one is a model unless they really are a model!

Once a profile and photograph is up and running, it is time to begin the search. A person may choose to do nothing; as they most certainly will receive emails and messages from others. However, to find a partner it is best to be pro-active and go looking. If one person does not reply, it does not matter, as there will be twice as many that do. A bit of flirting, a bit of chatting, a phone call and then a person may find they are never home alone again on a Saturday night.

http://articles.syl.com/greatonlinedatingforjapaneseamericansingles.html

Dating Options For The Native American Single

Are you a Native American single in search of your one true soul mate? Are you looking for another Native American single who shares your passion for the Native American culture? Native Americans may feel limited in what resources are out there, but there are dating options available such as personal advertisements, singles services, social gatherings, speed dating, and on-line dating services. After a little research, one will find that certain dating sites actually cater to the Native American single. So, put your best foot forward, keep a positive attitude, and remember love may come when you least expect it.

It’s tough being a single person in today’s day and age. If you are beyond your high school or college years, the number of people you can potentially meet drops significantly. You can no longer hope to meet someone in your English class or accidentally bump into a hottie at a house party. Your avenues for meeting new people become somewhat limited. There is always the hope that you might meet someone at work or maybe a friend knows a friend who has a friend who is single. Bars can be a risky pick up location because they are not noted for their high class of clientele. The advent of on-line dating services may help one’s cause. There are also other dating experiences as well, such as speed dating, which may help one find love. Regardless the avenue, dating is hard work.

Dating is defined as the activity of looking for a suitable partner for a relationship. Two people will agree on a time and date when to meet and engage in a predetermined activity. The activity could revolve around sharing a meal or sharing entertainment. One could go on a standard date, a double date, a group date, or even a blind date. What one looks for in a potential mate may vary as much as the type of date one goes on. However, one of the most important aspects of a successful relationship is compatibility. Successful relationships will involve couples who feel they have something in common. When looking for someone to be compatible with, ethnicity may factor into the equation. Some people may not mind dating outside of their race, but others may feel differently. So what if you are an Asian, African American, Latino, or a Native American single? There are options available.

Native Americans are indigenous people from regions in North America and are comprised of a large number of distinct tribes. The name of Indians was given to Native Americans by Christopher Columbus who mistakenly thought he was in the West Indies. Throughout history, differences in attitudes about the land and its resources have led to wars between European settlers and the Native Americans. This history between the white man and Native Americans might be one reason why a Native American single would be interested only in dating Native Americans.

There are resources available for the Native American single. Tribalsingles.com was established in 1998 and is a good site for the Native American single to explore. The site was created as a way to bring the Native American community together. You do not have to be a Native American single to enjoy this site, all nations and races are welcome. The dating site True.com offers options for the Native American single, as well as African Americans, Asians, and Latino singles, in addition to people looking for a Christian relationship. AmericanSingles.com, SinglesNet.com, and Gawwk.com are dating sites to explore as well. Some sites such as match.com and personals.yahoo.com allow a person to select their ethnic group using an advanced search. The Native American can also browse other singles by tribe at nativeamericanpassions.com.

In the world of dating, there are options available for those who would like to limit their search for their soul mate to singles within their race. One should remember however, regardless of ethnicity, dating can be difficult. When one finally meets that person of his or her dreams, though, it is all worthwhile.

http://articles.syl.com/datingoptionsforthenativeamericansingle.html

Dating Specifically For The "american christian"

Chances are you've heard of eharmony.com from the television commercials or radio. But what do you do if you are single and an "american christian" and you want to date other "american chirstian" singles? Do you surf the net or look through the personal ads? There are ways to find them. As you'll find out there are many programs just like eharmony.com specifically targeted for the "american christian". There is always the old fashioned way of meeting singles which is as simple as attending an "american baptist" church singles group.

Internet has changed the face of our dating procedures. Listing and posting personals on the Internet is one way of finding someone to date. Using the service called eharmony.com is another way of locating single adults for dating. What if you are a devoted “american christian” and want to find someone special that reflects your beliefs and lifestyle? There are services available to help you find that specific person that has those “american christian” beliefs.

Of course there is the traditional way of finding an “american christian” and that is by attending a singles group at a local church. Many of the “american baptist” churches have such a single group and they usually meet on Sunday and Wednesday evenings. Sometimes the right person for you isn’t at those gatherings, but the option is available.

The Internet and today’s technology has changed the way we meet potential mates. With instant messaging, e-mail and chat rooms there are ample ways to provide single people the ability to connect with that special person. What if you are really nervous about using today’s technology? The stories are out there about finding someone special and then when face to face with them they are not the person they portrayed themselves to be. This is especially true if you happen to be a devoted “american christian’ or attend faithfully the “american baptist” church.

The risks of online matchmaking are great, but any time people pursue romance naively or with the wrong motives problems will arise. The Internet can be a very good tool to use in finding a potential mate. The seekers of potential dates are a good cross-section of the average single-adult population. These single adults include “american christian” church members, mail carriers, soccer coaches, soccer moms, and other regular busy American folks.

The risks remain but there are ways to reduce the risk in locating that special “American Christian” single, or an “american baptist” single online. One of the advantages is that everyone involved is truly anonymous but you must proceed with caution. Respectable matchmaking services recognize these dangers and give great effort to create a safe environment for their members. Many people are convinced that meeting people through the Internet are dangerous. These are legitimate concerns, but many will use the “american Christian” dating services available from cyberspace. Romance is alive and well even in the 21st century. The dating game may just look different than meeting folks at a church social.

Some of these Internet dating sites for “american christian” matchmaking are as follows: ChristianDate.com; ChristianMatchMaker.com; ChristianCafe.com; EquallyYoked.com; ChristianSingles.com and Christianhearts.com. All of these encourage honesty and truthfulness, and they attempt to match people of like mind. So, happy dating via the Internet even if you are an “american chirstian.” The traditional method of finding an appropriate mate still works, but the normal relationship in the 21st century will be those couples who found each other through Internet dating.

http://articles.syl.com/datingspecificallyfortheamericanchristian.html

The Dating World Of African Americans In The U.S.

For singles, sometimes is seems like a struggle to find their match. While the world in filled with single available men and women, they do not just magically appear. In regard to single, dating African Americans, if living in areas that are not populated with a high mix of people with ethnic backgrounds, dating can be even more difficult. However the power of the Internet is fixing that.

Depending on which state and location an African American lives, single and available men and women may discover they are having difficulty finding quality dates. Everyone dreams of having a date with someone that leads to an exhilarating relationship. These days, people are busier than ever. In most locations, because of the state of the economy, people must labor long and hard at their careers. In addition, upkeep of homes or apartments can take up much of a person’s spare time. This leaves little time to dedicate to dating. One of the best available avenues for an African American to find their match is via online dating.

When the Internet first introduced this form of matchmaking, at first it was scoffed at. Singles were not sure what to make of it, wondering if it showed a sign of desperation or if it would truly be a quality way in which to meet others for potential dates. As the popularity of these sites grows, the stereotypes are slowly stripped away. Internet online dating is all the rage now and almost everyone has a friend, co-worker or family member who has decided to see what is out there.

For African American people, the online dating experience can be a bit daunting. Many sites offer their members the ability to choose which race of people they desire to meet. This can be an obstacle, but certainly can be overcome. Some issues may arise when an African American person is browsing through the site; spies someone that they feel they may be interested in and then click on their profile. Once reading the profile, they may discover that this person who had that wonderful smile or beautiful eyes has chosen to not date an African American person. This can be distressing and disappointing, but it is not something that should stop a person from continuing on in the online world of dating.

If this situation occurs, with all good reason, an African American person may feel irritated and take disinterest in the site. However, if a person stays calm and cool, no matter what their ethnic background, they will discover that for every person who limits themselves by color, there are ten more who know that color does not matter.

Once joining, an African American in the dating world of the Internet needs to have a very positive outlook. It is not just African Americans that are faced with prejudice, it is all races. There are African Americans who choose to not date Caucasians, and the list goes on. It is better to focus on one’s own personal journey, then to try to figure out the why or when’s of another personal decisions. Having a first-class attitude regarding the potential to meet another person is what really matters.

When it comes to dating African Americans, what matters most is creating a likeable profile, making sure photos are complimenting and likeable, and that one devotes some time each day to check emails and correspond with others. Just as in the word outside of the computer, if a person does not put some effort in to meeting someone, it is far less likely to happen.


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