Thursday, July 19, 2007

Dating-Tips-For-Single-Mums

Being a single mum doesn’t mean that you have devoted your entire life in babysitting. You have all the rights to go for a date and enjoy your life to the fullest…but remember too, the game of dating might not be that easy for you, because your children have become an intrinsic part of your life. Nevertheless, you are dying to get a man who can bring all the smiles in your life back and we assure you that there are lots of men who won’t run away after hearing about your baggage (Kids!). Here, our dating tips can prove to be really effective for you. So, let’s share some essential tips with you.

Make use of the Internet. Log into any dating site and chat to your heart’s content. Then, invite someone who has given you the most amazing chatting time.

Be clear whether you want a long-term relationship with him or a short term one.

Set up your date at a popular public place. Don’t give away your home address and phone number easily. Once the person you want to date succeeds in winning your trust, you can disclose your phone number, but make your home address known only after going out for a couple of dates.

Don’t forget to tell someone what place you have chosen for your date.

Try to observe all the movements and behavior of your date attentively. If you smell something fishy about him, just move away from the place as quickly as possible.

Make your priorities clear. Emphasize on your single-mum status and ask him clearly whether he is OK with it.

Request your friends to make calls while you are on a date. The reason behind this arrangement is if, somehow, your date turns out to be your object of irritation, then you can make certain excuses like ‘my babysitter has given the call and I have to rush back to home to attend my kid immediately.

Don’t ever let such guilty feelings come in your mind that you are doing anything wrong by going for a date, leaving your child at home. Looking for a date does not indicate that you are neglecting your kid. Keep in mind that you have the power of being a great lover and a doting mother at the same time.

Tell yourself that you are on a search for a responsible and loving father for your son, and not just a bed partner for you.

Boost up your confidence level and brush up your communication skills.

‘Can he be the ideal father to my daughters’? Try to make it out from the behavioral traits of your date.

Remember, being a mum doesn’t mean that you are going to talk about your children at every possible instance. Bring references of your little darling occasionally, but not every now and then. Unless, your date may run off!

Don’t get dressed up in a flashy outfit. Putting on too much make up is not at all desirable. But, that doesn’t mean you end up looking like a nun. Be yourself and try to create a balance between the looks of a dutiful mom and a single woman on a search for her soulmate.

Instead of focusing on your motherhood constantly, talk about your dreams and hobbies. Ask him about the same things.

Let your son/daughter know that you will be out for a date in the evening. Make them understand that you are a woman first, then a mother. But, all these necessary talking must be done in a proper and affectionate manner. Ask their reactions and opinions. Give them some time to think over the fact that their mum has a separate identity of her own and she is trying her best to create equilibrium between her single parenthood, work and love life.

Make your dating plans after hearing your child’s reactions. Be considerate enough towards them and make sure that they are absolutely comfortable with your idea of dating again. Never ever generate pressure on their young minds. Make them understand your situation slowly and always be your loving best. Give them some time to come in terms with your state of affairs.

Don’t date just for the sake of it and just to forget your traumatic past experiences. Never rush to any conclusion or take an important decision regarding your date hastily.

Never become afraid of failures, always remember that you can have better luck next time.

Request your son to behave well when you bring your date home for meeting him.

Dating a single man with a kid has its own advantages. Let your children mix among themselves. Try to notice whether he is showering the same love and affection on your son as he is doing on his own daughter.

Try to notice whether he has formed an emotional attachment with your child or he is just pretending to be a great father just for getting you in his bed.

Try to learn from your past mistakes and also bear in mind that same rules cannot be applied in every relationships.


http://www.acmearticles.com/Article/Dating-Tips-For-Single-Mums/38645