Thursday, June 21, 2007

How To Tell If You Have Chemistry

When you're attracted to someone, you might realize it right from the start. They make you feel special or they make your face curl into a smile each time they're around. You can't explain it, but you can feel it right into your toes. But are these feelings enough to tell if you have the right chemistry or not? Here's what you should be looking for:

How do you feel when they are around?

Whenever you are around a certain person, take a personal inventory of how you feel. Are you happy or are you less than happy? Try to figure out how you are feeling each time they walk into the room. Are you excited to see them and feel anxious to talk to them and be in their presence? The more positive you feel about the way this person makes you feel, the more chemistry you will have.

How do you feel when they are not around?

You don't want to feel like you can't go on, but do you feel like something is missing when the person in question is not around? Do you somehow feel like you're not having as much fun as you could if they were? When the person isn't around, you should be feeling a little less than happy. You might feel like you want them to be around you right then and that everything would be better if they were with you.

How do they feel when you're around?

This is a trickier thing to measure as you can never really tell what someone is feeling unless you ask them. But there are subtle clues a person may be giving off that can show you whether they enjoy your company or not.

  • Open body language - If they are trying to face you to talk to you, keeping their arms uncrossed and not crossing any other part of their body, it shows that they want to remain open to you and to whatever you are saying. This is a good sign that they are attracted to you.

  • Eye contact - While the other person shouldn't be leering at you, making direct eye contact when they are speaking to you and when they are listening to you is a great way to tell if you have chemistry or not.

  • Increased pupil dilation - This is a little harder to tell, but if you're making eye contact with them, you will see that this happens. The black part of the eye will become bigger when a person is excited to talk to someone that the like. It might not be tremendously different, but it will certainly change in size.

  • A relaxed expression - Not everyone will grin from ear to ear when they talk to someone they like, but they should seem relaxed and calm when they are around you. Their face should not be stiff or strained. When you see crinkles around the eyes, this is a sign that the person is relaxed as they look at you.

What are they saying to you?

Chemistry can also be seen in the way that someone talks to you. People that are positive about their lives when they talk are generally feeling positive about the person with whom they are speaking. Subliminally, they are trying to show that they are a good person, so they are only showcasing the good in their lives.

Other things that you can look for include:

  • A tendency to make plans - When you're talking to someone and they're already making plans for the two of you to see each other more or do something exciting down the road, this is a sign that they want to spend more time with you.

  • Attempts at humor - Not everyone is as funny as a comedian, but when someone tries to be humorous with you, it's a sign that they want to make you happy and that they really want to please you. Of course, being fake in trying to be funny can go over badly.

  • A touch when they are talking - No matter what they are saying, if someone tries to touch you when they are talking with you - and it doesn't have to be anything more than a quick touch - it is a sign of good chemistry between you, especially when you don't turn away from the touch.

Good chemistry is hard to find, but when you find it, you'll know.

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